why did the chef go to jail? because he was caught beating an egg

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Why did the man burn his face? He went into a fire. :D

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have multiple personality disorder, NO YOU DON'T!

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What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

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How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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You know, dark humor just isn't everyone's cup of liquiffied dead baby.

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The customers observing this quickly leave because the bartender is talking to a horse, which does not talk.

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2 guys walk into a bar. You'd hink one of them should have seen it. After all, it is a large building.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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Two cannibals are eating around a fire in the jungle, and one turns to the other and says "Does this taste funny to you?" Oh yeah, and they're eating a clown.

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Q: What do African Americans and Doorknobs have in common? A: Before the Emancipation Proclamation was passed, neither was free. Doorknobs still aren't free.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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