What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

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A man and a talking elephant in a waist coat go to a party. The party is actually an intervention for the man because he's on drugs and is ruing his life. The elephant is not real.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse replies "I have cancer"

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What is purple after you stroke it a lot? An eggplant

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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What's round and red? A round and red solid.

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What do you call a small weapon used by northern russians? A Gun.

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What did the genie say to the frog? Go home.

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What is the speed limit in front of Liberace's house? 40mph because that portion of the road is curved.

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Your mother is so fat that she wears xxxL clothing

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What's bad for your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops