What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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How long does it take to cook a baby in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy jacking off.

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A young christian boy walks into a church and gets raped

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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A hayride would be fun.

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Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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If a tree falls on a house and there's no one there to hear it....Why was there no woman in the kitchen?

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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What did the Nazi call the Jew? Alex.

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You're mama's so fat: she has to wear plus size clothing

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Why was John the octopus depressed? Because his real name was Steve, and he couldn't communicate this to anyone since he lacked the higher brain functions and vocal chords required to do so.

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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