A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Why did the boy cry? Because he was mercilessly beaten by his mother.

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Yo momma's so short, it's probably because she's in a wheelchair.

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thumbs up!

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

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2+2= 478

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What do you call someone who can't move their arms or their legs A quadriplegic

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

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96

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What's the number one killer in America? Death.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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A priest, a rabbi and a shaman walk into a bar. Except there is no rabbi and there is no shaman and the bar is actually my 8th birthday party priest is molesting me. And the priest is my dad. My dad molested me. A lot...

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken decided go get cigarettes and then hang out at a bar. The chicken sitts next to horse, the horse says "Why the sad face?" The chicken justs sitts there, thinking about the insanity that he has caused. "I don't know, is my joke not getting old?" Replied the chicken.

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Jesus wept.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a human being of Aztec descent, while a bench is an inanimate object used most frequently as a place to sit.

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LOL -LOL GUY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops