Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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Why does an Irish cop wear a belt? To hold up his pants.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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Why? Because racecar.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What is the loneliest number to exist? Zero. Except it's not lonely. I'm just saying there are zero lonely numbers. Numbers aren't sentient. They can't feel loneliness.

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

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What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods They both have beards... EXCEPT FOR TIGER WOODS.

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What's orange and rhymes with parrot? Carrot

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

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Nice legs....What time do they open?

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

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Knock knock. Who's there? You know. You know who? "Call him Voldemort.... Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself."

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A Mexican, and Arab and an American are on a plane. The the plane is going down. It hits a mountain and crashes. But there was also a lot of other people on the plane. Families, children, loved ones. It was huge a disaster.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone? A. He got attacked by a dog.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops