Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

thumb_up thumb_down -40

knock knock whos there? your mother your mother who? ...........what?

thumb_up thumb_down -52

Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

thumb_up thumb_down -84

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +111

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because they're humans and many humans enjoy the savory taste of fried chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Whats yellow and shaped like a banana? Bananas

thumb_up thumb_down +55

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is created to be used by multiple people for sitting down or other forms of rest, and does not have consciousness or the complex body systems of humans and other animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

What did the thief get for Christmas? Nothing. He was sentenced to the death penalty.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the number one killer in America? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

thumb_up thumb_down +9

who did the strait guy marry? a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +9

1.Knock Knock 2.Who's there? 1.Boo 2.Boo Wh- The second person realized that the first person was about to make him cry so he stabbed the first person. 2.Who's cryin now Son!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mamma's so stupid, she dropped out of college.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How many Chuck Norrises does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: negitave 999999999999999999e

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the punchline of this joke? There isn't one.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -9

a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops