Why did the police stopped the black driver? Because one of his car's lights was busted.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What did one duck say to the other? "Quack!"

thumb_up thumb_down +43

A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What do you get when 100 sex-crazed gays are in the same room? About a quart.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What happened to the public server who went to the 5 dollar brothel? He contracted syphilis and died several months later.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Everyday I'm.. Stepping on a beach. A roop a doo! Stepping on a Beach. do do do? do!!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's funnier than 24? 25.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops