A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Amblyopsidae, or blindfish, commonly found in caves where they are well adapted to life in the dark.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was kidding about the wheels.

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Who's fat? Holly Davis.

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Hey guess what? Nevermind.

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Why did the motorcyclist die? I heard he was sat on by Chuck Norris.

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Two guys walk in to a bar the third one ducks.

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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Why is ur cousin gay? because ya dad

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I like turtoes.

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Will you marry me? I'm an atheist. ,.

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thumbs up!

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

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Asian NASCAR.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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