all ur antijoke are belong to us or i mean we can share, whatever

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Who's more mean than teacher Hitler

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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I like turtoes.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Once upon a time there was a very lonely man. He was kind, strong, handsome, smart, and basically everything that was good and that a girl wanted. Well, one day, through all his immense loneliness, he decided that it was time that he got into a relationship. Knowing that he deserved a competent and pure woman, he went to a local church to search for his perfect match. That night, he took home with him the most beautiful and purest of all the women in the church, brought her to his room, and whipped out his junk on her face.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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girls basketball

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wanna hear a joke? womens rights!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

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What do you get if you put a black man in the blender and then in the microwave ? ... I don't know, that's why I'm asking.

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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anti-joke teehee

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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