What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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As a teen girl was walking through the perfume shop, she picked up one called, "Swirly Paradise." She sprayed it on her and sniffed the sweet scent. Suddenly, the world spun around and she suddenly woke up inside an empty bra. A mouse sniffed her and ate her alive.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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3 jews are walking into a bar. the first jew orders a shot of vodka, drinks it and says "long live my family!" the second jew orders a shot of whiskey, drinks it and says "long live my friends" the third jew orders water, because he is the one that is driving tonight.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Why was Jeremy slow? He wasnt fast.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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What's the difference between donuts and dead babies I don't have a pile of donuts in my garage

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Two black guys walk into a country club and ask to play a round of golf. They are turned away because the aren't members of the club.

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why cant the black guy vote? because hes not 18 yet.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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