What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

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What has tomato Sauce And came from italy? Pizza

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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What looks like poop and smells like cheese??

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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What did one terrorist say to another? You first.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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How many squirrels does it take to change a light bulb? 10 because they're so darn stupid!

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Jingle bells, jingle bells, Jingle all the way Oh what fun it is to ride in a poop poop fart turd fart, dildo

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops