why did Sussie fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock knock whose there not Sussie

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What did the little girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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What do you call a fly with no wings? Joseph

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Have you seen stevie wonders house? Nope... Neither has he

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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A cannibal wearing a sport coat, grey slacks, and a pink tie walks into a bar holding a duck in one hand, a chicken in the other, and chewing on a human arm. He is subsequently shot by one of the patrons. There's a concealed weapons law here.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! That is a joke which very few people would find even mildly entertaining.

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What's the color of an apple? It varies depending on the type of tree and climate the fruit grows in.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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2 guys are best friends from birth, one goes crazy and kills the others family and feel hatred towards each other for eternity.

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What's the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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Why did the chicken walk into Mordor? It didn't. One does not simply walk into Mordor.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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why was the boy in his closet? He is hiding because his father beats him because he is gay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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