There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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what is pink and fluffly? pink fluff

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What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

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If you live in the 'living' room, what do you do in the others? You die.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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A man sees a hitchhiker on a road. The man crashes because he was not watching the road.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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A man walks into a bar... But, it's not funny because he's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

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A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

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Man 1: youre going to die Man 2: why? Man 1: everyone dies

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf. That would be irresponsible/

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What do super heroes say after they beat the villain? Nothing, super heroes are not real.

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What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Your mother." "Your mother who?" "Really?"

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Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

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Do not believe the sentence below. Believe the sentence above.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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