Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What is white a can't climb up a tree? A fridge.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to vote off obama

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yo momma is so ugly, she is unpleasant to look at!

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Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

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God said "let there be light" Chuck Noris said "say please

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Jesus wept.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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A man walks into a bar. "Excuse me sir," he asks, "may I have a beer?" "No," says the bartender.

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How do you kill something thats already dead? You don't. It's dead.

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thumbs up!

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How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

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What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Arrow to the Knee

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Where do you find your quadriplegic dog? Right where you left it.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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Know what's worse than being publicly embarrassed in front of your crush? Jeffrey dahmer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops