Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A black man walks into an all white bar. He was escorted out, ten months later he died of a heart attack

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when a girl falls? Another girl pees her pants

thumb_up thumb_down -10

hey i just met you and this is crazy but hears my number so call me maby .....7 days

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Rub-a-dub-dub three men in a tub, and one was Sandusky.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Your momma's so fat...

thumb_up thumb_down -92

3 out of 4 questions. The lion king was holding a meeting and every animal was there except for one. What animal wasn't there? The elephant. It was still in the fridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -134

What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

thumb_up thumb_down -138

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A guy walks into a bar, orders a beer, pays, and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a black man in a cotton field? A farmer

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I'm gonna put my nut-sack on your drum set

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

How many finger does a fat person have? I don't know you can never find there hands.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops