Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

your mama is so fat that she weighs 261 pounds.

What's a vampire's favorite subject in school? Probably math.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Who's fat? Holly Davis.

What did Darth Vader say to Luke? I am your father.

A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

Q: What did the one legged homeless person get for christmass? A: Frostbite.

When life hands you lemons hand them back because you don't like lemons

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One says "boy it sure is hot in here." The other says,"yeah like 350-375"

Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

A girl walks into a bar. She unfortunately meets a man with a drinking problem. The man takes her home, strips her of her virginity and then beats her with a bat until she can no longer breathe. Her name was Laura Pratz.

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

what did max say to shelby? I hate black people.

Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

girls basketball

The economy.

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Actually it couldn't even walk because of all the hormones they injected into it in order to genetically enhance it's size and flavor.

A man walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender immediately tells him to leave as they don't allow pets.

Knock Knock! Come in.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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