Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

9/11

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumbs up!

Runescape.

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

What did Elvis say when he lost his voice? Nothing.

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

What did the blonde say to the priest? Probably something stupid due to the fact that she's blonde.

I'm funny.

A BABY seal walks into a club

Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

Your momma's so fat that when she goes to the beach, she feels self-conscious in front of all the other beach-goers.

what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

A violent biker gang walks into a bar to have a few drinks, the bar tender says "I'm sorry we can not serve you here." They then proceed to beat the man violently.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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