Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

What's the difference between your mom and a toaster? A toaster won't period in your cereal bowl.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

Hello, nice to meet you.

How Long is a Chinese name.

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

Q: What do you call a hillbilly with 12 girl friends? A: A shepherd.

Why did the window break? I threw a pig out it.

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

What looks like dirt, smells like dirt, but isn't dirt? Fake dirt!!

A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

what do you do if there is a black person in your front yard? tell him to leave...

Will you marry me? No, I'm cake.

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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