What do Kenyans do at night? Starve.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

What did the deaf Jewish Rabbi say to the Italian Priest. What?

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

What did charles get his sister for christmas? Nothing, he's dead

A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

Q. why can't hellen keller drive? A. because she is dead

What do you call an Italian baby born with an extra toe? He was named Vincent Antonio Linguini and has been doing well with six toes.

Why did Aodhan not come into school? He was sick.

Gay jokes are a real pain in the butt.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

Q: what do you call someone on Anti Jokes A: Someone with no friends trying to find a funny joke to make friends.

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

What makes fat kids laugh? Jokes.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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