I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

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What is bright yellow and tastes like Gatorade? Antifreeze

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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What type of cheese is not your cheese? The cheese that belongs to another person.

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Why was the little boy sad? He tried to dry off his puppy in the oven.

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A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

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How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

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Miami Heat.

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how do you make a baby float take you foot of its head

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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What did the Pikachu say to the Charmander? Pika pika pikachu pika!

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what do you call a gay kid? KIRK, SAV, FRANK, or even KIRKLE THE TURTLE

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Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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hrih

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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