A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. Look at my new shoes.

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What do you call a brunette between two blondes? Susan.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are finally spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinical depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Why is Kayne West such a jerk? He has autism.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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A man goes to the doctor complaining of pain. Everywhere I touch it hurts, he tells the doctor. "The cancer has spread," the doctor says. "Go home and spend your last days with your loved ones."

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Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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whats worse than getting beaten up by a bully? realizing your fly was down the whole time and getting beaten up by a bully

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Why doesnt Mexico have a navy? Because cardboard doesnt float.

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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girl says..joe..................................................................... boy says...who is joe................. girl..the idiot of a helper at my skl

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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Why did the hamster run around the wheel.? Because he lived in a small cage and had nothing better to do.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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A blond and a brunette took an IQ test. Both of them scored above average.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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