Why was the boy sad? Because he met Larry.

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3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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You.

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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what has legs but can't walk? a paraplegic

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A man walks into a bar... and watches the Monday Night Football game with his pals.

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What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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Once upon a time a girl took a gun and shot herself in the face

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Whats he best type of terroist? A dead one.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Christians

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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