If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They brutally whipped and tortured her.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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What did the blind man say to the deaf man? It doesn't matter because the deaf man couldn't hear him.

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom...

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A black kid, an Asian kid, and a Jewish kid walk into a barrier. They are students at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry and they walk straight through the barrier onto Platform 9 3/4.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb? One. Midgets are capable of doing an average person's everyday task. Unless they have autism, then they might as well die.

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Why could'nt Boris fit in with the other kids? His name was Boris.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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I went to see a fight and all of a sudden a hockey game broke out.

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you say "ask me if im a tree" he says "r u a tree?" you say"no..." then just stare at them

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so a baby seal walks into a club...

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What color is a banana? yellow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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