Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

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Q - Why did the boy die? A - He had AIDS because his father raped him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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hi

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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what is the difference of left and right? i used my right hand to stab your mother.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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Wumbo

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a sponge is not a who, it is a what.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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A horse walks into a bar and then out of the bar

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pedophile

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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Reduce, reuse, recycle Anti-joke.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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