roses are red violets are blue the stems are green they smell good

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11 9/11 Who? You said you'd never forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

My girlfriend never swallows; she has a rare esophageal disease that's potentially fatal.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A barrel of monkeys is only a barrel of laughs if they're alive and telling jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

To the person who wrote the dislike joke: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAH GOOD FAIL!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

thumb_up thumb_down -49

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Kony 2012

thumb_up thumb_down -65

Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

thumb_up thumb_down -89

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Chikin nuggets

thumb_up thumb_down +32

"The lack of a punch line is the punch line" Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

thumb_up thumb_down +26

This comment is anti to jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You might be redneck if you are... Indian

thumb_up thumb_down +18

You.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops