What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

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I Hear Boston Is having a blast.

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A kid walks into a shop and asks the shopkeeper for a loaf of bread. The shopkeeper says, "White, wholemeal or multigrain?". The kid replies, "No thanks. My bike's outside".

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a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

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Knock knock. Whose there. Uninterupting black lady. Uninter.... MMMMMMMHHHHMMMM. Black ladies never listen

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Q: What happened to Michael Jackson yesterday? A: Nothing.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Whats the fastest way to a man's heart?? Saw through his breastplate.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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a: How can you tell you are not pregnant? b: I don’t know. a: Like this: I’m not pregnant.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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What do you call a black man in a suit? A lawyer.

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Just open the damn door

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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