Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Cause it looks like you landed on your face.

a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

How do you make a man sit down? Hold him at gunpoint.

What rymes with milk..... milf

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

A guy vociferiously kills another person- fueled by the incentive of personal gain provided by his rapacious, human nature. He is an army soldier who's triumphant in battle and hoping to recieve a promotion. However, ultimately all he did was essentially insignificantt and his acts of purported valor were diametrically unnoticed by all except for his closest friends/allies. He never did supass his original self of a soldier and died of a natural cause that was disclosed only to the members of his immediate family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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