knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Knock, Knock. Come in.

Alan: My Grandfather has a jacket made from jews that he killed while he was in the SS. James: Really? Alan: No, I'm Korean. My Grandfather would not be allowing into the SS.

Suck my bigvagina you faggetass bitchybuns

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

What's the difference between a dead baby and a Cadillac? A Cadillac is a car, and a dead baby is a morose and disgusting topic of internet humor.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

The NBA lockout

Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

what did the little boy see when he walked into his parents bed room a bed

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

Q: How did the blind girl on the tight rope die? A: She fell because she has Parkinsons

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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