Why did the girl say 'baa'? Because she was a lamb.

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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Welcome to Watchmojo dot com and today we'll be talking about the Top 10 numbers from 1 through 10. In this episode we will be discussing which numbers from 1 to 10 gain popularity and mainstream appeal amongst people from all over the world. Number 10. 10 (Ten) Number 9. 6 (Six) Number 8. 8 (Eight) Number 7. 4 (Four) Number 6. 5 (Five) Number 5. 3 (Three) Number 4. 2 (Two) Number 3. 9 (Nine) Number 2. 7 (Seven) Here are some honorable mentions: 3.14 9.9 1 and a half Number 1. 1 (One)

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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There was an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman... They all died in a horrible train wreck.

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Why did the child drop it's lollipop? Because they got hit by a bus.

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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why was the man itchy? because he had herpies

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Q: what did the hot dog say to the hamburger A: i want your buns

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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what did batman Say to robin before they got into the car? get in the car

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Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

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What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

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Why did the man mysteriously disappear? Because he was hiding without telling anyone that he was hiding.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing. I lied about the deer.

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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What happens if Pinocchio says "My nose is about to grow." Nothing, Pinocchio was a fictional character created by Walt Disney.

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Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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