What did he hellen keller say to her dad ? Nothing she cant talk

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Lizards are like marshmellows. If you put them in the microwave they blow up.

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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a little boy told his friend he failed a test.. the friend replied that his parents r goin to kill him... to save himself the suffering ...the boy hung himself in his closet

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hrih

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*Random individual accidentally throws a ball toward another person's head while chilling out with friends* *The ball comes into contact with the victim's cranium- causing him much pain, but not serious detriment.* Q: Are you feeling okay? A: No, I'm dizzy and am currently in very bad shape Response after initial inquiry was articulated: "Uhmmmm...Sorry?" Lesson of significance to be learned from this tragic incident: One's developed, habitual reactions to certain occasions/events of particular interest are virtually always practically impossible to completely override with the means of logic when one is experiencing the relevant occurances him/herself personally. One usually finds it inordanitely difficult to free him/herself from one's regular routines.

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What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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A man walks into a bar and says: "ouch!"

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What happened to the boy when he did nothing? The game.

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BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH 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BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH 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BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BIT

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Why wasn't the 7 year old boy happy? I shot him

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says "MOOOOO!". The other makes an unremarkably similar noise.

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Q. Whats the difference between watermelons and people? A. Watermelons don't smoke pot...

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither. The single celled amoeba. As billions of years passed, the simple amoeba began to form limbs which it utilized to crawl its way out of the ocean onto dry land. Millions of years would pass before the simplified organism began to develop into a fully functional chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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