Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

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Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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what's harder than dodging bullets? dodging rain

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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A horse walks into a bar... Horses are not indigenous to China.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are driving in a car. They're on their way to the mall, or something.

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Q. What's funnier than an anti-joke? A. Thousands of anti-jokes, compiled on a worldwide network.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sargeant John Smith mam. I regret to inform you that your husband died in the line of fire - I'm sorry.

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Why did the cockroach cross the road? Why do you ask?

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You.

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how many Alzheimer's patients does it take ti screw in a lightbulb? to get to the other side

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Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

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Q: What do you get when an angry black man walks past you. A: You get a promotion, the black guy was your friend Bob and he had just been suspended for failing to follow police protocol when apprehending a suspect.

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Why was the man unable to get an erection? Because he was a woman

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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What do you call a three legged man? Horribly deformed

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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