What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

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What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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Whats worse than contracting H.I.V.? nothing

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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BUT HWY?

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Roses are Red Voilets are Red I am Red I am Dead

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How many Facebook friends does George Bush have? None because he doesn't have a Facebook.

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So a priest and an atheist sit next to eachother train After talking to eachother for a short period of time, the priest discovers the other man's beliefs and procededs to spend the rest of the ride trying to convert the atheist. Incredibly irritated the atheist gets off the train a stop early to escape the tirade. The next day the atheist sees on tv that the train crashed right after getting off, and the priest is listed amongst the people killed in the accident. He is ecstatic, and says to himself "ha, proof of divine retribution," but then he feels confused because he realizes he doesn't believe in a god...

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What do stuffed animals and living animals have in common? There both living except the stuffed animal.

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I have a knock knock joke. You start.

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What did Tarzan say when he took out his knife? I took out my knife.

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It was the eve of December and a man was using a blanket why? because it was cold and he wanted to be able to function properly at work so his boss would not get mad at him because he respected his boss and wanted to make him happy

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what did the Spanish priest say to the Ukranian gynocologist? *fart*

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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How do you fit 100 babies in a bucket? put them in a blender. How do you get them out? potato chips.

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A man walks into a bar and slowly draws a pistol and kills 5 people.

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Why do people discriminate against black people? Because they show an undeserving amount of disrespect towards the rest of the world and why should they get anything better than what they offer.

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What happened to the Caucasian man who went to Vegas? He lost all his money so the government took away his car and his house so he had to become homeless and live on the streets begging for money from any who walked by until he slowly starved to death after eating food left in restaurants and trashcans.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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