A man walked into a bar and said ow.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My room is a mess, Violets are still blue

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

What is black and white and red all over? A zebra that has been shot, because poaching is quite common in many African savannas.

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

Knock Knock! Come in.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Where did all the time go? In a recent study, 100% of all time, all systems go.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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