1134

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What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

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Knock, knock! “Who's there?” “The Gestapo.”

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My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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Why is it bees travel in formation, one side is longer than the other? ... There are more bees on one side

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced to against his will by a group of marauding ninjas who happened to be strolling by at the time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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