What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

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69.9

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Why did the duck cross the road? To get cream cheese.

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Knock, Knock Who is there? Yo Yo who? *the man ran away and was never seen again, because he had nowhere to stay*

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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