Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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lebron

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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What did the dog say to the cat? I have no idea. I wasn't there.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

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what is not funny? This joke.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

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a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

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A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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