What's similar between a flamingo and a rhino? They're both pink...except the rhino

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penis

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

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Your mom is so fat she has to buy clothes at a Plus-size clothing store.

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What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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What a vase and a cheeseburger have in common? It has it's price.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

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whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

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A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops