Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Howdy stranger.... It is time for you to join! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! SO TOTALLY FUN UNIT! Moral: "HEY YOU! STFU! STFU! STFU! STFU!"

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

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Obama 2012

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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what happened to the guy that got attacked by a shark he died

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A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops