2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

Why do Mexicans like to eat burritos? They are delicious.

I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

Hi

Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

acuna

Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

A fat man on a moped

Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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