What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

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What do you call two Ethiopians standing side-by-side? Friends

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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Q: What's the Difference between Judaism and Catholicism? A: There are many substantial and vital distinctions between Judaism and Christianity. Of course, there are many similarities as well, primarily because Christianity emerged from Judaism. However, the emergence was not a direct line. Christianity broke from Judaism, forming a new religion, so it is misleading, however comfortable the thought might be, to believe that the two religions are essentially the same, or to see Christianity as the natural continuation of Judaism.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

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I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? People leading healthy, active lives physically and socially.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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