Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartenders says, "why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because horses do not comprehend English. He then becomes startled by his surroundings and bolts out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

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A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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Obama 2012

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Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

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What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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A man walks around a bar.

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So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

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Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

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A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

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Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

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A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

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roses are red violets are blue i had sex with your dog

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Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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