why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

Your moms so fat She should get some help because there's nothing good about being fat

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

26.5% of Americans are obese.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink? What was the Alzheimer patient favorite drink?

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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