I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

1134

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Know what's funny? Jokes.

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "Come in" "Come in who?"

Obama 2012

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

A BABY seal walks into a club

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

You.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...