how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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What's worse then biting into an apple and finding a worm in it? The spelling errors on anti-jokes.com

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What do you call a group of homosexuals placing an order at McDonalds? Gay

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how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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equality for women

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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how do you wake up lady gaga poke her face

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knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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