Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

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Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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A fat man on a moped

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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Yo Mama is so stupid, she was riding her bike down the street when she was distracted and rode off a cliff. Oh crap I am so sorry.

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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lebron

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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Why did little Jimmy eat his finger ? He was hungry.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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