What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

Runescape.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

two muffins were in an oven. one muffin says, "gee, its hot in here." the other one says, "AH! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Dick Chaney

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

FIRE!!

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

Why was the Catholic priest incarcerated? 2 counts of child pornography and 3 counts of sexual abuse with a minor. Since he is now released, he's working as a janitor of an elementary school.

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has insomnia.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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