Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

Q. The square root of 69 is 8 something, right? A. Yes, to be exact it is 8.30662386.

What rhymes with you? You.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

Dick Chaney

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

The Colts this year.

well it rained all night the day i left, the weather it was dry, i can't remember the words but susana don't you cry oh susana don't you cry for me for i come from alabama with a banjo on my knee oh

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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