what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

A fat man on a moped

Runescape.

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

What do you a a toilet with fecal matter in it? A toilet.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? A warm meal thanks to a Charity organization.

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

Knock Knock. No one answered, as the person of residence was not home.

What's the best way to eat 20 pancakes in ten minutes? With a fork

whats black. an african american person

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate flowers and am making fun of them by messing up this originally beautiful poem about those repulsive manisfestations of pure evil.

Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

What's round and red? A round and red solid.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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