What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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Geuss what? Bob is wide awake and he likes strawberries but he didn't have any strawberries so he ate a hamburger but fred wanted a hamburger but bob ate it so he just ate bob but bob was wide awake so he saw fred eating him so he called the pigs to come and eat fred because pigs eat anything but the pigs had already eaten their daily freds so they ate bob because they hadn't already eaten their daily bob but fred had already eaten bob so they got angry at fred so they just ate him anyway but then they got fat so a wolf ate them but then some hunters killed the wolf and ate it so they are actually eating a hamburger because the wolf ate the pigs and the pigs ate fred and fred ate bob and bobb ate a hambuger but he actually likes strawberries.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why did the black man perform well? Because he was a well trained musician by the name of Stevie Wonder.

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I went to buy some camouflage shorst the other day but I couldn't find any.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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How long does it take a black woman to take a shit? Why in the world would you want to know something like that? But anyway, the answer is somewhere, on average, between 10 seconds and 15 minutes. It really varies and conditions like irritable bowel syndrome and constipation affect this range. Actually it takes about 9 months.

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

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lebron

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A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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What rymes with milk..... milf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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