Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

whats the difference between samios and a dog? Nothing.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

You.

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

Jesus

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, ask him.

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

Yo mama is so fat that her dietician often recommends that she decrease her calorie intake and exercise more often to avoid risk of diabetes or potentially a stroke.

The NBA lockout

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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