How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

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What is worse than finding a dead mouse in your loaf of bread? A lot of things since you were able to sue the bread company for tens of thousands of dollars.

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape the overwhelming feeling of self doubt created by an abusive drug addicted father which has left him seeking life threatening situations that should never befall a simple chicken.

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I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

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Why did the fireman wear suspenders? To keep his pants up.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

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Jesus can walk on water. Babies are 75% water. I can walk on babies. I am... In jail.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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Have you heard of Helen Keller's dog? No. Neither has she

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Whats worse than the Halocaust? Your mom

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What's brown and says "Hey, I'm a dog"? A talking dog, able to grasp the English language.

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If you helped Jack on the horse, would you help Jack off the horse? Of course; if he was too short to climb onto the saddle then it would be irresponsible and potentially dangerous not to help him off. As his riding instructor, you would be liable for any injuries Jack sustained had he attempted to dismount the horse with no assistance.

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Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

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1134

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what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops