What's the difference between a pile of dead baby's and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage...

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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2 guys walk into a bar, a third guy carefully ducks under it

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One time, I ate 3 chipotle burritos....after a tennis match

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

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How do you upset Muslims? Kill their leader. Whoops, already did.

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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Why can't Michael Jackson drive? Because he's dead.

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what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

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I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree? Because he was dead.

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What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the world series? No Cubs!

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

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Did you hear about that show where two crazy guy got on stage and the show had to be canceled. I didnt either.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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