Why coulden't the fish swim? He got poked in the eye with my nipple. My nipples get really big when I'm swimming in cold water.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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hrih

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

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The Holocaust

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Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

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How Long is a Chinese name.

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What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

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Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

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Gale swallows.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "No."

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What's worse than getting Alzheimer's? ........what am I doing here.....

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Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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Yo mama so stupid she liked this joke

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Knock knock whose there? i have a warrant, i excpect you to come out peacefully with you hands behind you back

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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