what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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What's better than winning a Gold Medal in the Special Olympics? Not being handicapped in the first place.

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What did the idiot call his pet zebra? Charlie. The fact that the man is an idiot is irrelevant.

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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Roses are red, Muslims are brown, When I see them swimming, I hope that they drown!

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Why was the thirteen year old raped by an online predator? Because he made very poor choices on giving out his personal information.

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what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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pedophile

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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Your mother is such a whore that she has consensual sex with a lot of people...

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Yo Momma's so old... She has lived a great life and you should be very proud of her even though she is slowly dying of a degenerative disease.

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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