What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

women's rights

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

Dick Chaney

how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

What's Rupert bear's middle name? the

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

What is the difference between obama and a hobo. NOTHING

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

Runescape.

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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