Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

Obama 2012

Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

Yo mama is so hairy she should probably start shaving.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. ~Stevie Wonder

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

What did the paraplegic boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish.

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

A Asian man with a boner runs and hits the wall... He beaks his nose.

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...