Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

knock knock who's there ? dogs dogs who? phone

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do snowmen eat for lunch? Snowmen don't eat, they're inanimate balls of of solid precipitation with rocks for smiles and eyes and carrots for noses.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why do black people always say to the left to the left... because they don't have rights.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Hey Tim lets think of a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

thumb_up thumb_down -21

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A woman is about to buy a house and is faced with a difficult decision. She must choose which house she'll buy the next day. During the night she thinks about it and the next morning she has made a rational decision. What house did she choose ? TRICK QUESTION - Women can't make rational decisions.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

thumb_up thumb_down -57

A: Knock knock. B: Who's there? A: Banana! B: Not you again..(slams door)

thumb_up thumb_down -85

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -153

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops