26.5% of Americans are obese.

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Why dont you ever see any black mermaids? Mermaids dont exist.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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America Votes

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

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Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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You.

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops