When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot.

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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acuna

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Why did the tree fall? I cut it.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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Q: Whats Faster than a bullet A: A Jew chasing coin

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? This isn't a car

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I need somebody to lean on... ...Because one of my legs was amputated after I was blown up on a mine field in afganistan.

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How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops