Why did the kitten die? Because your mom is gay.

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Why did the horse have 5 legs? She was still giving birth.

Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

3 aliens landed on earth. They all wanted to learn english. The first alien went to an opera class and learned "mi mi mi mi mi." The second alien went to a military camp and learned "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The third alien went to a candy shop and learned "he stole my lollipop!" After all of that, they went to their spaceship and saw a dead man and a cop that said, "which one of you three killed this man?" The first alien said "mi mi mi mi mi." The cop said "what did you kill him with?" The second alien said "guns and bazookas, guns and bazookas!" The cop then said "why did you kill him?" The third alien said "he stole my lollipop!"

Obama 2012

what's worse than jamming a finger in a door the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust jamming 2 fingers in a door

Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

What kind of cheese is not you cheese? Not your cheese.

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

This guys walks in a forest and meets a bear. So he says : - Yo yo, whattup, bear ? And the bear says "ROAR!" Because he's a bear.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

What's worse than dropping an ice cream cone? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Dropping two ice cream cones.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

69.9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...