Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

a young mother calf named near reality was milking itself and selling it at pathmark everyday for high prices he got a lot of money out of it and bought a big mansion where he also had a farm and collected prize show cows to show off to all of his cow friends.... he also bought gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons and gallons of prize show cow milk to drink to and build up energy for the cow show race coming up in the near fall. Every sunset he buys loads of milk to drink and feed his plants with. He plants lots of grass every day to eat and produce high quality milk goods. He was a wii, ps3, and xbox360 to play everyday and excercise his udder milk.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The brunette and the redhead escape, but the blonde is captured. Why? Because she had a prosthetic leg sustained from a previous injury, and thus couldn't run very fast.

what is the difference of a duck..... it neither wears tie.....

what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

why did the ginger start crying. because people through bricks at him!

A black man, a Jewish man, and a gay man walk into a bar. They are all good friends who want to enjoy drinks together.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Why don't Polish girls swim in the sea? The only sea that Poland borders on is the Baltic. Throughout most of the year this sea is too cold to comfortably swim in.

A man walks into a bar and the the llama next store sprouted wings and flew Then a potato says hi to a iPod but unfortunatly the iPod can't talk. Meanwhile hello kitty and ducks wage a nuclear war and the rise of ostriches Started. The a giant cucumber started falling of mt. Everest and killed many Flying platipuses were saved. Then aliens started invading and the world ended.

whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

lebron

A man walks around a bar.

Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

What's the worst part about male roller blading? AIDS.

I used to be an Adventurer like you... But then I decided that it was a dangerous form of employment and stopped.

What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

What is white, and hurts when it falls from a tree? -tom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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