Knock Knock, Get the f*ck off my porch

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

women sitting on a bench quietly. they have no ability to speak.

What did the orphan say to the other orphan? Annie is my favorite movie.

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

why was the dog barking?? bryan is a douche..... get it troupe.

what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

Why do black people eat fried chicken? Because it's delicious.

what do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names.

What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

Why didn't the man enter the bus driven by a black man ? It wasn't going where the man had to go.

whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

How many hispanics does it take to screw in a light bulb. One. Just one. You just screw it in, it's not that complicated.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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