Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

What is green and would kill you if it fell out of a tree and onto your head? A pool table.

what did jesus say to moses? jesus isn't real

Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

A guy walks into a bar. He then comes home at 4 a.m. to beat his wife.

Your mom is so ugly, that her job prospects are affected negatively, and your family suffers as a consequence.

How did Hitler make the world a better place? He died.

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza is an inanimate object, while a black man is a person. racist F.u.c.k.

a duck walks into a bar, sits down and asks for grapes. the bartender says, "no, we don't serve grapes." so the duck leaves. the next day the duck goes back to the bar, takes a seat. "got any grapes?" the bartender says, "i already told you we don't serve grapes here. if you come in here and ask for grapes one more time, i'm going to staple your beak to the wall!" the duck leaves. the next day, the duck returns, sits at the bar and asks, "got any staples?" the bartender replies, "no, but there's an Office Max next door where you might find some."

So there's this mexican with a big sombrero riding a donkey, it was a sunny day and he didn't feel like walking.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

Your mama's so fat, she gets confused with Santa Claus.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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