Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

Knock Knock Who's there? Donald Trump Donald Trump who? I already told you my full name. You're fired!

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

whats worse than losing your pet rock? having your dog run over buy a car.

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

Two elephants are in a bath tub. The first elephant says to the other elephant, "can you pass the soap?" The second elephant then replied, "No soap, radio."

A man who is down on his luck was told that when one door closes a window opens. So he jumped out.

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

Q: How do you get a bunch of mexicans attention? A: Say excuse me, can I have your attention please?

Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

What's the difference between a large pizza and a black man? The pizza is a delicious Italian classic dish, while the latter is a human being which man frown at the notion of consuming.

I'm so popular... That I am friends with many people...

What's the difference between a red cube and a green cube? Nothing, I'm color blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Whats the best way to take down a skycraper? -Crash a plane into it-

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

What's the difference between a black man and cake? I like cake.

What do u call a guy that loves the color blue? A smurf

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Grandma's dead. call the paramedics.

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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