What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt? Getting stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A man walks around a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender-"Hey we don't serve your kind here!" The duck-"What ducks?" The bartender -"No Jewish"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

person 1 - what's big, green and ugly? person 2 - don't know. what's big, green and ugly? person 1 - nothing is

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

You.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why do women wear make-up and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse than a black President... George W Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the black man shoot everyone? Because he is black

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's that smell? Your feces droping in the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -30

whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What is pink and smells like green paint? Pink paint

thumb_up thumb_down -76

Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -142

How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down -158

What did the peach say to the apple? Nothing. Peaches can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops