Whats the difference between a new ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a new ferrari in my garage.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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knock knock. who's there pismil pismil who pigsmil cookies

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Want to hear a joke about Potassium? So do I.

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They are then baked at 375 for about 30 minutes and then taken out to cool.

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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The Holocaust

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Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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A fish walks into a bad Fish dont walk

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My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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What did the nurse say to the doctor? Boo-hoo, i was pranked over the phone, i'm gonna kill myself now.

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roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

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What's worse than being a black Jew? Being a racists anti-Semite.

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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A BABY seal walks into a club

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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