why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the middle of the oceon? Dead in the water.

How many days did abraham lincoln take a crap for? Turquoise because pancakes cannot fly without wings during the summer unless giraffes smell pineapple on tuesday.

What are corpses favorite form of entertainment? nothing, there dead.

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Butter. Butter who? Oh, um, sorry i forgot the rest...

What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

A kitten walks into a bar and orders a saucer of milk. Everyone enjoys the novelty of his presence.

A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

why did the blond stare at a carton of orange juice for 2 hours? because she was reading the nutrition list, and she is a slow and patient reader.

how do you stop a baby crying hit it with a brick.

Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

knock knock whos there ? Jordan Jordan who ? Jordan Walters

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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