Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

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What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

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Q: Why did the bully hit the kid A:Because he is a bully-I thought that would have been self explanitory.

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

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what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

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A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

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how to u kill a baby with no arms, throw it in a pool

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Hi

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what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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acuna

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Your mommas so fat that she has developed adult onset diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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