Why did the baby cross the road? cause it was stapled to the chicken.

What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

Women's Rights

Why did the white man accuse the black man of stealing his wallet? Because they were the only two men in the room at the time of the theft

What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

lebron

what did the little girl do after drinking a smoothie? she choked and died a painful death.

whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

I bought a DVD called "the 18 holes of Tiger Woods". It was a fascinating incite into the golfing technique of arguably one of the greatest sportsmen of all time.

When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

What's the difference between a turtle and a bird? They both fly. Except the turtle.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.

How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

a 12 year eld Maxican girl is aksed to spell the werd newmonia she gets it rite and wins the spalling beef which makes me sad bcuz English is my forst langage and i still dont get it and im 25

what's funnier than 1 Mecican? 2 Mexicans

Knock Knock Who's There? I am. I am who? I think someone has contracted amnesia.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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