Why did the hipster hate black people? Because he was racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

thumb_up thumb_down +29

roses are grey, violets are grey, i'm colourblind and shit at poetry

thumb_up thumb_down +27

your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walked into a bar. What did he say? Ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A black guy, a Mexican guy and a Jew walk into a hospital. They are all undergoing the same chemotherapy treatment.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

How many blondes does it take to dye their own hair black and act in an intelligent, sensible manner?

thumb_up thumb_down -53

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

thumb_up thumb_down -67

How's your mum? she's dead..

thumb_up thumb_down -113

Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +110

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

thumb_up thumb_down +58

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

thumb_up thumb_down +56

Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock Knock. Whos there? Victor. Victor who? Victor Secret, the gay door to door lingerie salesman. Can i interest you in a plastic cup holder?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you get when you cross a rhino and an elephant? Two angry pachyderms.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock Knock Who's there? It's the postman, I have a package you need to sign for.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops