What do you call a black person who drives a plane? A pilot.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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A man walks into a bar. He buys a beer, drinks it and walks out.

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A man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" he shouted after he stubbed his toe on a table.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

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Mum: Never put off for tomorrow what can be done today. Child: Oh, I was going to play video games tomorrow, so...

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Jesus

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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why were the little boy's clothes all wet? because they found his body in the bottom of a river.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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What did the penguins get for Christmas? A hang-glider What did the polar bears get for Christmas? Death, The Holocaust, Global Warming, and all of Steven King's books.

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Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

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What's green and has 4 wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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1134

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lebron

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

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It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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Me: Knock Knock! You: Door's Open!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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