How many dead babies can you fit in a trash can? 12- 18 (depending on size) I know this because i use to work at a abortion clinic

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your a Jew, I don't like you.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? John. Oh, hey! Come in.

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Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Every 20 seconds, a child in africa starves to death... Every 30 seconds, an obese american teen stuffs their face with McDonalds

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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Why did the cow cross the road? To get to the slaughter house

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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Why was timmy crying? He gave his grandmother AIDs...

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Hey Tim lets think of a joke

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To be honest that sounds like more of a mental health issue and not something I'm qualified to deal with as a GP. Let me refer you.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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