what did the pregnant mexiCAN woMAN say while she was giving birth? A LOT of curse words

Gale swallows.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

BUT HWY?

A frog found a smoking cigarette on the road, so he/she takes it, smokes it, and explodes.

The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? there were no more cars in the way

Jesus

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

What do you call a black man without a job? Unemployed.

Thomas Hobbes had a good life Actually he was born prematurely which caused his mother to die, and his alcohallic father left him at a young age to an abusive older brother sucks to suck Hobbes, at least you were smart

What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

Whats worse than falling down the stairs? Falling UP the stairs.

After a long day on the movie set, Lindsay Lohan decides to go out to a bar. She gets really drunk and high on drugs and some guy takes her back to her trailer and stuffs her muffin.

How do you kill Michael Jackson? You don't he is dead.

If Barbie is so popular...why do you have to buy her friends?

Whats better than pizza? Pepperoni pizza, if you like pepperoni that is.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I like to sniff your hair when you are asleep.

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Playing chess with a pigeon is like having an argument with a christian. No matter how good you are at chess, the pigeon will just knock over the pieces, crap on the board and strut around like it's victorious.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Whats the difference between Michael Jackson and an avacado? Michael Jackson molested a 12 year old boy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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