A person was born on may 5th 1955 and one day noticed that they had $555.55 in their bank account. The person went to a race and betted all their money on the 5th runner in the 5th race. What happened? The runner came in 5th place.

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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Why did the pollock jump into the sea? A pollock is a fish.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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56

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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Nate has 32 candy bars. he eats 28 of them. What is he left with? 4 candy bars

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Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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Dick Chaney

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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