Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man walks into a bar with a couple of chickens by his side. He sees a man sitting at the bar drinking a beer. The man who's drinking the beer offers the other man a seat, and asks him to join him in the drinking. The other man hardly refuses and takes the glass from the other man and throws it on the with all his power to the floor. The man sitting at the bar asks him why he did it. The man answers: "My chickens don't like beer"

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How did the cat die? I just it nine times

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Why did the vegetarian only work one day? Because her co-workers are cannibals.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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How do you occupy a blonde for hours ? Give her a long list of stuff to do.

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Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

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The Holocaust

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Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

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Your carpol will be here soon! What a pool for cars is coming?

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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Roses are red Violets are purple I just got raped by a clown

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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Chuck Norris can watch TV.

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

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How do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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A nun, a jew, and a KKK member are all stuck together in a lifeboat. A large wave overturns the boat and they all drown.

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Women's rights.

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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Your so ugly That when you look into a mirror it shows an accurate potrail of your unproportionit face

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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