Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

Why Did the baby cross the street? He was stapled to the chicken's back

How did the fat man die? Someone who was mad at society shot him and many others in the head while at the workplace.

Inquiry: After the specially hired detective in shades of black had managed to finish his secret investigation of the crime scene, what significant affair did he demand and expect to subsequently occur next in the logical chain of events? Answer: A specific transaction of money. To elaborate, immediate providance of previously allotted recompense in the particular configuration of myriad pristine wads of cash.

Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

Your mama is so fat she is morbid obese.

What do you call a man with three testicles? Polyorchid. Look it up.

knock! knock! who's there? mom mom who? your mom... your girlfriend just died in a car accident while carrying you baby...

How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was recently released from prison for violent crimes.

A crazy priest squats down and poops in the middle of the church... nobody understood what was going so they pointed and laughed.

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

what do you call a homosexual kid? A Kerich

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

A: Knock knock B: "NOOOO" A: *Comes in, sees masturbating son*

Yo mammas so fat she went on a diet.

On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because my first shot missed.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

An old man gets into a van with two little boys. They are his grandsons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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