if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he pushes himself up.

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Two muffins are in an oven. One muffin says its getting hot in here the other muffin say holy shit a talking muffin.

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What's green and has wheels? A cucumber with wheels.

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Why? Because racecar.

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

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I went to the store and I fell

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Why wouldnt NASA send a blackman into space without a space suit? Because space is a vacuum there is no air no atmosphere the tempurature is almost zero kelvin so if you ever go out int space please dont take off your helmet out there because you would freeze to death almost instantaniously.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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Jesus

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Why did Charlie fall? He got shot 24 times in the chest.

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What did the young girl get for Christmas? Violently raped and murdered by her abusive father.

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Why did the chess grandmaster lose his mind? Because he died of old age.

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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