What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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GONNA

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What goes in long and hard and comes out wet and sticky? A penis after orgasmic intercourse.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? -I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Why did Michael Jackson ask a Best Buy clerk for the best 3D TV? He didn't ... He's dead.

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What do birds need when they're sick? Medical attention

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Being cut in half by a human while you were trying to eat an apple

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Know what's funny? Jokes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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