How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get a ladder and carry him down.

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What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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Why are atheists stupid? Actually, statistically, they are more intelligent than believers.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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A blind man walks into a bar Backs up, and walks around it.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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Women's rights.

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Q. Did you hear about the kid napping? A. Yeah, he woke up and was grumpy

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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why did the chicken cross the road ??? why would you care??

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

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Knock knock

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A blonde walks into a library. "PLEASE CAN I HAVE A CHEESEBURGER?!" he shouts at the top of his lungs. "Sir, this is a library," the librarian says. "Oh, sorry," he whispers and goes to McDonald's Two years of the routine and he dies of of heart failure and has diabetes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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