Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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whats worse than 10 babies in a mail box 1 baby in 10 mail boxes

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven ate nine

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roses are grey, violets are grey, i dont have any cones, just rods.

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What did the sphinx say to the Minotaur? Nothing, as they are fictional creatures and in according to probable science, don't not exist.

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Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

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Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

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Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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A Horse walks into a bar and the barman says 'What with the long face?' and the horse replys 'i'm a f*cking horse.'

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Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

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What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

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Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

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What do you call a pig with no arms? A pig, pigs don't have arms

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Q: What did my uncle Tom say when he first encountered my friend Richard Jefferson? A: Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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