Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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How's your mum? she's dead..

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What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Pizza? A Jew is a person either born into or converted to Judaism, and a Pizza is a disc shaped, oven baked bread typically topped with tomato sauce and cheese.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Whats funnier than a anti-joke? 911

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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How do you have sex with the blue waffle? stick your penis inside

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Whats 9+10? 19

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

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The pope and three young boys get into a cab. The pope tells the driver to take the boys home.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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you momas so fat, you momas so ugly Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late great Salvador Dali mistook them for cloth.

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Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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Hi

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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