It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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What rhymes with you? You.

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What do you get when you cross a pelican with a mountain goat? It's hard to say.

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Two gay guys walked in to a bar. It's unfair of me to make the assumption that they're gay, they just be really good friends whom aren't opposed to touching each other.

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What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

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Roses are red violets are blue ... Aww I just don't give a damn and nether do you.

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There is a running race, both black and white people are running in this race! Half way through there is an avalanche and every black person running was killed! Who won the race??? Society... :D

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Why was the woman making a sandwhich in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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What do you call a dead blond in a closet? A homicide victim.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

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YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing set? She had no arms.

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How do you fit 100 ethiopians in a phone box? With great difficulty.

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What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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Did you hear the one about the priest, the rabbi, the astronaut, the olympic diver, the mcdonald's employee, and the web designer? Neither did I...

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How do you get rid of a boomerang? There are many potential options for getting rid of your boomerang. You can choose to pass it on to somebody as a gift, make a profit through thrift stores or online auctions or perhaps sell it in a newspaper. Alternatively you may wish to simply dispose of it. The average reading speed of an American adult is 300 words per minute. This was exactly 100 words. This means that it took approximately 20 seconds to read it. This means that approximately 4 people died of cancer world wide while you read this.

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Why did Sally fall of the Swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Sally

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Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

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a:two guys are white but one of the guys can only see black and white so he said dude you black he said no so they have a race who won :nobody they both got hit by a bus then a car then a donkey eaea then a horse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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