Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo Were your parents drunk when they named you?

nick toth

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

What rhymes with you? You.

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

Sarah Palin

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

Whats 9+10? 19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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