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yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

Want to hear a joke? Me to...

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

My wife's star sign was cancer and it's quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

What's more stinky than a fart? More farts.

How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

What's black and white and red all over? And old fashioned television painted red.

Jesus

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he wanted to get to the other side.

how do you make a joke act like yourself

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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