A bear walks into a bar. The building is evacuated swiftly but several people are killed

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Animal cruelty

My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

Why was the man sad after mowing is lawn? He ran over his dog.

Why'd the cat have one eye? It got kicked by a goat.

Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

womens sports...

Whats 9+10? 19

Knock knock Who's there? A friend. But I don't have any friends.

Dick Chaney

Why was the boy sad? His friend stabbed him with a fork. Also, his mother died. Also, his dad raped him Also, he has a chode. And it really sucks when you have a chode.

i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

What is the similarety between a car and a banana? Both starts with B

Why was the globe sad? Because it was cut in half.

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

Your momma's so ugly she adopted you because she had a problem attracting men.

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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