what do giraffes have that other animals don't have? -baby giraffes

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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What is the difference between muffins and cornbread? I don't enjoy sticking cornbread in my anus.

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whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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whats the hardest part of roller skating. Telling your dad that you are gay.

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lebron

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What's the difference between an orange? Mooses don't like to wear sweater-vests.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, most likely, the chicken escaped from a near by ranch or farm. Upon escaping, he may have simply wandered in the direction of the road, and hence crossed it. Or, with chickens having great curiosity, may have been attracted to something on the other side of the road and felt the urge to explore. Depending on the demographics of the area in which road was in, the chicken had different chances of being hit by an automobile. That's why.

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A wolf boards a plane with two dead rabbits in his mouth. The flight attendant approaches him and says, "Sir, you can only have one of those on the plane." The wolf bites her throat out.

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34

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

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Women's Rights

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whats silver and cries? a coin, although it can't cry because its a coin. So it's just silver

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -.......

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

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what did the atheist get for Christmas? Nothing. If he was being truly honest to his beliefs, he wouldn't partake in a christian holiday.

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What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

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Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

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What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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