If one train goes east at 30mph and another train goes south at 53mph, how many pancakes does it take to make a mattress? 7 because peanut butter can't climb trees.

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The big problem with politicians is they're always lying but fortunately there's always a moment when it's not a problem anymore. When they do it down in their tombs.

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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What do you get when you cross Chuck Norris with a Cheetah? A yellow Chuck Norris with black spots.

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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what is not funny? This joke.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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You walk in to your room. 7 chickens on your bed.

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69.9

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Want to hear a joke? Me to...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

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Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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