How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

A Priest, a Rabbi, and Santa Claus are on a plane. This is impossible because Santa Claus does not exist.

What's worse than being gay? Dying in a gas chamber in the Holocaust.

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

What do you call a black man jumping out of a plane? A skydiver

What's the difference between black people and white people? Their skin color.

What is black, white and red all over? A nun in a blender

Dick Chaney

Why did the chicken cross the road? A scorpion was trying to sting it in the anus and it wanted to escape the undoubtedly painful consequences.

Richard fell off of a cliff. He can fly.

Knock Knock Who's There? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith, I'm the town rapist.

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

What would George Washington do if he was alive today? Scream and scrach at the top of his coffin.

On a scale of one to 10, F*ck yourself.

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

If you're American when you go into the bathroom, and American when you come out, what are you inside? American! What are you, a communist?

Jesus

A guy walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a schizophrenic, And so am I.

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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