Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

what the hell happened to your face

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What did the homosexual eat for breakfast? A light meal consisting of fruit and whole grains, so he could keep his weight down.

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

How much does a polar bear weigh? Around a thousand pounds.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

Oh look, I've found my knife

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

What did the phone say to the telephone? I can't connect with you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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