Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

What happened to the blonde that died her hair brown? Her hair turned brown.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

America Votes

One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

what is not funny? This joke.

Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

69.9

whats white and smells like black paint? nothing, white paint even though it is still paint has a slightly different smell due to the difference in dye colors used to make it

Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

yo mama so fat that she should be concerned because diabetes is a serious issue

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

56

Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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