How do you tell if someone is a Jew? Ask them politely.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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What's 6 inches long, held in your hand, and has a round tip? A pencil you pervert.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and a cherry red Ferrari? A cherry red Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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Religion

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

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Why didn't Betty ride her bike to school? She had no legs.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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"Ask me if I'm a billboard" "Are you a billboard?" "No"

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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