What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

Why do Jewish people like money so much? Because they can exchange it for goods and services

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

I have sex daily, I mean dyslexia.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

women's rights

What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

Q:How many doorknobs should you throw at a police man? A:None you should have upmost respect for the law.

how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

YouTube comment: If I get a cent for every pixel on the screen. I would have... $960 for a 224p video $2049.6 240p video $1296 for a 270p video $2304 for a 360p video $4099.2 for a 480p video $9984 for a 520p video $9216 for a 720p video $20736 for a 1080p video $125829.12 for a 2304p video ... I would be RICH!!

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

What do you call a boy that fell off a ferry? Extremely unlucky, since one of the other passengers noticed and the captain turned the ferry around, threw him a ladder, and pulled him aboard. Also he died of hepatitis because his mother was too poor to afford condoms, so he was born with it.

why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

What's white and sticky? A white stick.

Do you know what's fun about having sex with twenty-seven year-olds? There are twenty of them.

Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

What did the grass say to the human "Hey" The human then screams and runs to safety

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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