My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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One aardvark says to the other aardvark, "Hi." The other aardvark says, "Ahh! A talking aarkvard."

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America Votes

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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Q: What is hard and long on a man? A: His wife's funeral

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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Why did the one pound coin cross the road? It was stuck up the chickens ass

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A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

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i think i have a problem with these jokes they aren't finny

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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It's raining, it's pouring The old man is snoring He went to bed, he bumped his head Got a brain hemorrhage and died in his sleep.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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What did the homeless get for Christmas? Nothing By Nathaniel c

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Q: What did the mime say to the crowd gathered at the crime scene? A:

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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How many jews can get in a Volvo? 5.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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