Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Little Johnny asks his father how babies are made. So the father rapes him from behind.

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a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Haikus are awesome, but sometimes they dont make sense. Refrigerator.

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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My Roomate-(crying in the fetal position for the love of his life has been murderer) Me- (laughing) I have a problem

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have Alzheimers, Cheese on Toast.

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How do you fit 1,000 Jews in a Volkswagen? Trick question, you can't.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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FIRE!!

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why does king kong so fat? because he eats to much

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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