2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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What's pink and smells like chicken? A pink hair band, I was lying about the chicken part.

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The meme walks out of the bar.

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A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the long face?". The horse doesn't reply because horse can't talk.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Q: why did Helen Keller's dog kill himself? A: Because he couldn't stand to see his owner suffer through blindness and deafness and being the butt of hundreds of offensive and hurtful jokes.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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