Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Weiner? A: You can never make "fetch" happen.

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An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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What's black, white,and red all over? A crime scene where a black and white man were brutally murdered by a psychopath that is still on the loose and could be killing someone else.

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Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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What did the guard say to the... I was going to finish this anti-joke but I took an arrow to the knee.

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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Yee

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Why does Jonny have a phobia birds? Because he has one glued to his face.

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Women's Rights

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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