What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Why did the deaf man go to the concert? He had recently acquired a brand new hearing aid which meant that he was able to hear much better and decided that he wanted to listen to some music.

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Sarah Palin

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why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman immediately calls the local stable to report the missing stallion, and his owner promptly arrives to take him home. He thanks the landlord and offers a small reward, but it is respectfully declined.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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why did the chicken cross the road? It is a domestic bird in the wild that is free to go where ever it wants to, that's why

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? know on knows as he can't talk

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Q. How many pancakes can fit in a dog house? A. 0. Penguins don't like icecream.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops