What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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what the hell happened to your face

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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why did the boy drop his ice cream? he tripped over his mother's dead body

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Knock Knock "Who's There?" *No answer* The man proceeds to go on with his life

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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Knock knock. Who's there? Awkward silence Awkward silence who? ...

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

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America Votes

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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Why did the boy on stilts pick up the phone? Because it was ringing.

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Q: What did the diddler say to the little boy? A: Can i touch you inappropriately?

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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