A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

"What's 'green', 'blue', and 'red' all over?" My color-blind friend said in confusion.

What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

I've got a boner

Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

Wat do you do when you see aomeone bleeding on the ground? Walk away and act like nothing happened

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

Knock, Knock The door's open

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why did the angry husband murder his cheating wife? She forgot to cook dinner.

here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

88

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

What do you call a black man who flies a plane? A pilot, you racist!

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

why is billy g is really supid because he gets bad grades

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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