i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What kind of cookies does a pedophile order from the girl scouts? Samoas...pedophiles love coconut.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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teacher: what comes after 69? johnny: mouthwash teacher: get out.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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what the hell happened to your face

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

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Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

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What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What did Justin Bieber get for Christmas? An iPod Touch and a few nice sweaters.

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What do you call a bunny with a knife in his chest? Emo

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cactus cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens butt.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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I've got a boner

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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