Whats Obama's last name?

thumb_up thumb_down +114

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

WOMENS RIGHTS

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's brown and sticky? a stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What did John F. Kennedy say to Kurt Cobain? Nothing. They never met.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

thumb_up thumb_down +18

"Welcome to Mcdonalds, Would you like to try our new Chicken BigMac today?" "No"

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do wake up Lady Gaga You Poker her face

thumb_up thumb_down -14

a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops