roses are red violets are blue you look like a monkey lets take you to the zoo if by chance you try to escape ill take my fist and smash your little monkey face! btw i made this up if you use it ill kick your nuts!!!!

A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

Yee

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

your mommy so gehto shes black

What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

Q:What do you call a black man on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call the entire race of black people on the moon? A:A problem solved

What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

Obama.

guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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