What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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What's brown and sticky? a stick.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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What call a black man flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why can't black people swim? Because most African American individuals grow up in inner urban cities where they have little or no access to swimming facilities.

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nick toth

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Hey, where'd my tractor go?

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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Roses are red, violets are blue That's a fact.

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Your mother is so fat.... I am happy to see her join our exercise group.

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What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

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Why didn't Helen Keller have headphones? Because they weren't invented

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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