What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

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What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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Yee

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She was hungry.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What cheese is not yours? The one that you didn't buy.

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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Q:What do you call a black man on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call 100 black men on the moon? A:A problem. Q:What do you call the entire race of black people on the moon? A:A problem solved

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Obama.

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There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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why did the puppy have a sticky tongue? because its owner was abusive and made the puppy lick peanut butter from his balls

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Knock Knock Whose there? A field full of mexicans A field full if mexicans who? F**k You

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Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Women's Rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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