what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

You know whats funny? Things that aren't listed here.

That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

if a white guy, a black guy and a hispanic guy jump off a 10 story building, who hits the ground first? the man who jumped first. racist.

What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? - "Robin, get in the Batmobile"

here's a joke a black man goes in a store and buy something

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

Did you hear about the kid napping? They found his body in a ditch.

Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...