Knock knock Who's there? Labrinth Come in

Did you see that picture of Helen Keller's dad? Yes. She didn't.

What did the man want a car for his birthday? 7.

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

An Irishman walks into a bar. He gets extremely drunk and gets hit by a train.

elliot forsythe is a paedo

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

What's green and invisible? This cabbage.

What do the Holocaust and baseball have in common? They are sports, except the Holocaust.

A black man and a hispanic man are riding in a car. Who's driving? The hispanic man

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

a man walks into a bar he is an alcohol and it's ruining his family

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

A Woman out of the kitchen

A quadrapeldgic walks no where

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange Orange. Aren't You Glad I Didn't Say Cliterus?

a jew throwing a dime into a wishing well.

whats annoying and black? black people

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...