It's black, and when it falls out of a tree, your refrigurator is broken. Your refrigurator.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What did the republican say to the democrat? You suck!

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How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

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Women's Rights

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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What happened when a boy threw a ball at the wall? It hit him in the face

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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Your mother is so dumb. It's a good thing she knows sign language.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was arrested by the ASPCA and PETA for letting the chicken run free near a horribly busy road

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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FIRE!!

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

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i was molested.

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A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

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why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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