Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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What is the most attractive part of a woman's body? The part where she doesn't have a penis. I know, I know, the no-penis thing looks weird and strange, but hear me out. I think it's kind of cute and quirky. Like, oops, there's something that's supposed to be there, but isn't.

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A priest and a rabbi are playing golf one weekend. The priest tees off first. When the rabbi steps up to tee off, it begins to rain heavily. Dismayed, the rabbi says, "I thought it there was only a 10% chance of rain today."

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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what do you call a black man flying a plane? a pilot you racist.

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What does a turkey do? I don't know I'm not a turkey

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Three nuns walk into a bar. They realize they are in a place they don't want to be, so they leave, casting furtive glances around, fearing that someone from their congregation will see them and think they went in to drink.

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Why couldn't the old man play the piano? His arthritis caused him great pain.

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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a Jew had a small nose

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

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who did the strait guy marry? a woman

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A man and his family walk into a talent agent's office. The man proceeds to sexually accost his wife and children. The agent calls security who escort the family out and helps the wife find a domestic violence shelter to stay at.

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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What's cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Knock, knock Who's there? Landlord; you've been evicted.

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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Why are you asleep? Because I'm tired.

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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