Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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There was a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Gay Man on a plane. The plane was going down. The Priest said "amen". The Rabbi said "amein". The Gay Man put his penis in the rabbi's asshole.

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guy 1... "do you no any funny jokes?" guy2 ..."no" guy1 ..."same"

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A horse walks into a bar.. Several people get up and leave as they see the potential danger in the situation..

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a man cries out to god.... and god does't reply.

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

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Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

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knock knock Who's there? because 7 ate 9

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Knock Knock Who's there? Father Dougal Mcguire

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Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

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Why did the blind man cross the road? To end the suffering of a lifetime illness.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

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What did the tree say to himself? Gee-oma-tree( get it geometry say it outloud)

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Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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you: knock knock person: who's there you: interrupting cow person: interrupting cow you:MOOOOOOOOO

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Freeza: I am the strongest in the universe! (if you ignore my brother Coola which is much stronger and all...) Goku: You have pissed me off now Freeza, I will now turn into a super Asian and prove to the world that real Asians are actually blonde and blue eyed! (I am sure Goku means Sayans, which is "completely different") Goku: HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARG! Freeza: Omg, he... he... is trying to take a dump! IMPOSSIBLE! I will have to find his balls and caress them... Will Goku ever take a shit? Or reach all new levels of constipation during the series? Find out in the next episode of dragon ball z!

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3 men find a genie lamp on the side of a road, The genie grants them each a wish as they surely deserve. The first man asks for a jet and the genie glady grants him this and the man starts to fly away. The second man says to make a wall around asia and the genie complies. The third man thinks for a minute and finally says fill it with water and as a genie the genie cannot refuse. They all drowned seeing how the jet had no fuel. The genie goes back to sleep and is picked up by an alien 5,000 years in the future, the Earth is destroyed in 7012(as if we didnt already destroy it). The genie survives and currently resides on uranus.

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What did one man say to the other? I'm a Mormon.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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