What did the English teacher write on a sheet of assignment criteria? The assignment criteria. Plus, she spelled "millennium" wrong.

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Whats green and tasty? Snot

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hi hi strager danger

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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Woah again Nero, you are so wise... I love you, I really do. If someone can and has already changed the world for the better, its you. No wonder people believe you have superhuman abilities, I used to think so too, but I think I understand what humans can do on another level now, you did that, thank you.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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What did the furnace say to the Jew? Nothing, as it is an inanimate object and cannot communicate.

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What do you call a man with a sack of money running from a bank? A rich man.

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Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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Q:why did the chicken cross the road. A:to get back to the farm he was raised on

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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What's the difference between a tube of toothpaste and Youtube? If you squeeze a tube of toothpaste then toothpaste comes out. You cannot squeeze Youtube because it is a popular video sharing website. Even if you could squeeze it, no toothpaste would come out..

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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A homeless man is hungry. He then kills a college professor and has a nice dinner

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops