A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken? His name.

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Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Edward and Bella looked at each other. Then they both died. Oh, and Jacob is actually a transvestite.

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Knock Knock Who's there? me oh

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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What rhymes with you? You.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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Q:What are black basketball players good at? A:Running,shooting and stealing.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

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I love my valentine <3 Hes mine no matter what anyone says <3 Cause i love him with all my heart <3

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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What did the prisoner receive on his 44th birthday? Well obviously all mail in prisons is checked, but nothing dangerous was found. He received a book on different types of steam engines (he is a railway fan), some chocolate (galaxy caramel, which is his favourite), a crossword challenge book (he gets bored in his cell) and the anti joke book.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Religion

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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What did the duck say to the man? Nothing. Ducks cannot talk.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops