What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Q: What did the priest say to the rabbi? A: Our God is a wonderful, loving god; praise his name.

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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2 ducks walk into a bar. The first orders a drink, drinks it, and drops dead. The other duck said, "Bar tender! What did you put in my friends drink?" The bar tender said, "Poison."

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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John had 32 candy bars. He ate 28 of them. What does John have now? daibetes, john has diabetes.

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Q: What is a African man with funny clothing and children straddling onto his back for dear life/ screaming in fear who only a few minutes ago before a particular incident made several young children cry and being chased by an authority figure? A: An intentionally inane circus performer partcipating in a scintillating rendition alongside his two children of who inadvertently frightened a small group of youth before he immediately decided to proceed by, during one of his extremely long, albeit few breaks, taking the members of his family on an interesting excursion to the nearby amusement park for occassional thrills. On the initial journey there, the black man, out of haste, accidentally dropped one of his children's most valuable toys of which elicited undeniably obnoxious bouts of sadness to come bursting out of his children's respective chests and an increased rate-of-travel for his wife of who accopanied him on his adventure and desired to assist him in his panic. In the spin of events, the man experienced an instance of hyper-activedness and spun out of control for a minute before eventually cooling down. Hence the screaming.

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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Knock, Knock. Come in.

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Your momma's so fat... She's on a diet.

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

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Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day. Give a man a gun and he'll build you a refrigerator.

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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what did one caterpillar say to another caterpillar? let's be butterflies

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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How do you get a plumber to cry? Kill his family

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i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

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What did the girl get for her birthday? Nothing...cause she died

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A man walks into a bar He says ouch

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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Q: why did the boy cross the road A: because he was being chased by a pedophile

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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