What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

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Q: Why did the man move out of his house? A: He found another, for a better price.

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Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

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What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

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what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

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Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

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Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

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Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

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What did the boy do when he was cold? He got a blanket.

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Why did the Calculus teacher give an Asian student an F on a test? Because he got less than 60% of the answers correct.

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Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

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how long does it take for a black woman to poop? depending on what she ate, about 5 to 10 minutes

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Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

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why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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Why was the Jewish man put to death? Because he was convicted by a jury of his peers in a fair trial overseen by a judge in good standing in a United States court for 12 counts of homicide

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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