What did the Catholic preist say to the altar boy? You've been a good altar boy.

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

Your mom is so...wonderful.

what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? He said, "Where's my tractor?"

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

Q: what is more sad than being alone A: being alone with lots of cats

A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

whats red and smells like blue paint? Hank Kovalcik

FIRE!!

Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

Guess what? Chicken butt! No I have aids, you might want to get yourself tested

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

What couldn't the stereotypical pirate get into the movie? Well, considering that the stereotypical pirate existed in the sixteenth to eightteenth centuries and the first motion picture wasn't made until the mid to late nineteenth century, also the technology for time travel does not exist nor has it ever, I would have to derive that he was not let in due to the fact that there was no way for him to ever exist at the same time that a movie would have been playing.

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

Your mommas so fat that she may die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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