Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

How fast is the speed of sex? 70 mph, minimum 40 mph

thumb_up thumb_down -60

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

thumb_up thumb_down -116

Your mom is so...wonderful.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

What is the difference between a botlle of sun lotion and a Mexican? A bottle of sun lotion contains a lotion that protects your skin against the sun, and a Mexican is a person from Mexico.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Zebras.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Jon has 40 chololate bars, he eats 32, what does he have now? Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the black man steal purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon? Because it was the birthday of his 8 year old daughter with autism and she loves purple kool-aid, chicken and watermelon and he was very poor and wanted to make his little girl happy for once.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

why did the girl smear penut butter on the road. To go with the trafic jam

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's black and blue and red all over? A person who was just in a fight.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -165

whats annoying and black? black people

thumb_up thumb_down +120

what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops