A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

What's the difference between me and a dead baby? I'm not dead, or a baby. I am well into my teens and very healthy.

What do you call a donkey walking backwards a confused donkey

There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

What's funnier than House? Family Guy.

A quadrapeldgic walks no where

What did the priest do when he noticed the young boy bent over picking up crayons he had dropped? He helped him pick them up

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

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what do you call skiediving? a very fun but moderatly dangerouse sport that many people have fun doing from the ages of 19 to 31

What happens when you throw a cricket bat at a blonde? She is hurt and reports you to the police for anti-social behaviour.

What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

America Votes

what the hell happened to your face

Knock Knock. who's there? It's me. you need to be specific...

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Someone else's cheese.

A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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