An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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Cancer victim: What kind of doctor are you? Person 2: I'm not a doctor. In fact, I'm a suicide bomber and am planning to initiate the detonation sequence right now. Cancer victim: Well, it doesn't really matter. No matter who shows up, I'll still die anyways. This way, I'll be able to pay a visit to the transcendent city high in the heavens sooner. Person 2: I bet that many would mourn your death at your remembrance ceremony. Cancer victim: That doesn't bother me. My friends and family are close to my heart, but that doesn't warrant eternal proximity with one another in itself. Person 2: Let's go to a better place. Let us finally break free of our mortal chains that have unceasingly been hindering our progress since the first war took place. Cancer victim: Wait, I've changed my mind! Person 2: Too late. I wish I had a time machine... not.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

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How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

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What made parashoot paint's so uncool? MC Hammer.

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penis

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A quadrapeldgic walks no where

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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what has green paint and flies? a garbage truck

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Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

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I just lost the game where if you think about the game then you lose the game. so did you.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, She gave me AIDS, and I gave 'em to you! <3 <3

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Knock Know Who's there Interrupting ghost Interu--BOO!!! Ha HA!

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Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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