Oh look, I've found my knife

A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

someone called a frog a frog

Knock knock Who's there? That that that. What makes you say that?

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

Did you hear about the kidnapping yesterday? He slept for at least 3 hours.

Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

what do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Bob

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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