Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

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A man walked in a bar had 4 drinks and walked home because drunk driving is dangerous

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What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

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What black and blue and red all over? My mom after my dad comes back from the bar.

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A seal walks into a club...

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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A woman got in her car to drive to work. She kept her hands on the wheel and eyes on the road and was able to avoid any accidents that could have occurred.

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How do you kill a blond? You don't. If you do, you'll get reported to the cops and sent to jail.

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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Ask me how old my cat is. How old's your cat? I don't know.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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Your mom is so...wonderful.

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Dislike this!!!!!!

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a Jew had a small nose

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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