Q: How did that man get two black eyes? A: He was born!

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

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What couldn't the Asian drive? Because he had just gotten laser eye surgery, and the doctor recommended that he didn't drive for a few days.

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Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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a Jew had a small nose

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Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

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did you hear the one about the boyscout and his scoutmaster? They had a lovely relationship, and both went on to be role models.

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

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When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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A Polish man came home one day from work, hung up his coat, took off his hat and walked into his bedroom shouting "honey I'm home!" What should he see but his best friend in bed with his wife. Infuriated, he rushed to the cupboard, pulled out his gun, put it to his head, pulled the trigger, and died instantly. His children and lecherous wife are forever scarred.

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What did one muffin in the oven say to the other muffin Nothing food doesn't talk

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What's the most stupid thing you have ever heard? Woman's Studies.

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26.5% of Americans are obese.

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why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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