What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first koala. Why did the man fall of his bike? He was struck with a falling koala. Why did the fish fall of its bike? Because it's a fish. What is fuzzy and might kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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What did the woman say to her husband after he came home from a late night of drinking? Nothing, because the last time she did, she got her ass beat.

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why did aodhan not play BO2? Aodhan has Cerebral palsy.

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Knock knock Who's there? Timmy Timmy who? Timmy Smith

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What did the black man do with the woman's purse? Safely returned it to her

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your landlord. I'm here to collect rent

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What's worse than stepping on a lego? Being eaten alive by a man-sized spider.

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Ice cream You scream We all scream Because there is a murderer killing our friends

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What did the nintendo Wii say as it went down the slide? They don't talk.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scottishman walk into a gay bar. And why shoudn't they.

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Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

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A cow walks into a bar and says, "moo."

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how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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how do you make a joke act like yourself

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Oh look, I've found my knife

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whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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