26.5% of Americans are obese.

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these jokes are terrible, even for anti-jokes

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A Woman out of the kitchen

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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what did the girl trapped in the fire say? help

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What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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Q: What do a dildo salesman and a car salesman have in common? A: They are both salesman

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Q. You are driving a car. In front of you there is a camion driving at your same speed. Behind you there is a helicopter flying at your same speed at the ground level. On your left there is an ambulance driving at your same speed and on your right there is a ravine. How do you get out from this horrible situation? A. Get off the carousel.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

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A man walked into a bar, he then fell to the ground screaming in pain.

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What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

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*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and think it's original because I changed one word*

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There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Why was the man angry? Because I slept with his wife.

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why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

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Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

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I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

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What kind of animal eats and pisses on everything? Your mother. -Avery Vartanian

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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