A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? because she had no arms. Knock knock! who's there? not Sarah.

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Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

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There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

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Your d*ck is short, If we compare it to mine. That was it, Thank you for your time.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

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what is the difference between a Ferrari and a bucket of dead babies......... I dont have a Ferrari in my garage

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender for 4 beers. The bartender replies, "One at a time, mate, will that work for you?" To which the man replies, "No", leaves, and drives his 1994 Toyota Corolla off of the road into the pit of a volcano.

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Q: What do you call an aligator in a vest A: Investigator

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What's worse than women's rights? Actually, not much, because women throughout history suffered for too long the hardships of over dominant male figures and deserve the freedoms they have achieved today.

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Your mommas so fat that she may die.

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How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

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Roses are der, Violets are lube, I am dyslexic.

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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Ow, there's an arrow in my knee!

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why didnt the chicken cross the road? he did cross the road

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What starts with an F and ends with a UCK? Firetruck.

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Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I just ding dong ditched you.

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i'm a loser with body odor.. plus i play pokemon to pass the time because reality is just to horrible to face. guess who? josh wood.

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Did you hear about the guy who fell off the mountain? Oh, well he died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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