Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

What did one guy in the bar say to the other? Hi.

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAA HAHAHAaaa WHYYYYYYYYY!?

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

What did the girl with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Repeatedly raped by her alcoholic, child molesting father.

Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

All I want for Chrismas, the murderer of my parents to be caught.

I got 99 problems... and an indeterminate number of them are bitches.

How do you see a black man in the dark? You dont

In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

your mommy so gehto shes black

How do you make a small fortune? Be financially smart, work hard, save money, all while you make sure you don't let your earnings become a "large" fortune.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb? The lighbulb isn't also dying of terminal cancer.

4 on three... 1, 2, 3, 4!

Q: What did the pope say to the prostitute he passed in the street? A: Bath & Bodyworks are having a sale

A man walked into a bar. "Ouch"

What do you call two homosexuals in fancy hats? It depends, you have to ask their names first.

GONNA

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...