what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

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A man is sitting on a bench in a park crying a man walking by asks why he's crying, and the man answers that he has no idea why he's crying

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Whats Obama's last name?

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what's blue and white and red all over? -nothing the "red all over" part implies a contradiction to blue and white.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

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What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

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A man walked into a bar and said ow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know why, but I was standing on the other side of the road and I took it home and mamed the chicken with a powerdrill.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

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Women's Rights

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What's the difference between a white man and a black man? Nothing. They are both created in God's image and likeness so get your mind outta the gutter!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbor.

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Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

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what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

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Ever since I've been using chloroform as cologne I've been getting laid a lot.

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A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

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A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

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Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

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Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops