Pickup Line: Hay girl is that a mirror in your pants. Becuase I can see me in it.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Boom.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q: why are kittens so cute? A: because god created them that way. go fourth and enjoy kittens.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a chicken? One of its legs are both the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Q. Why do Puerto Ricans throw their trash away in clear plastic bags? A. So Italians can go window shopping.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -70

a muslim walks into a bar, he then remembers his religion forbids the drinking of alcohol and walks back out

thumb_up thumb_down -104

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down -134

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

thumb_up thumb_down +103

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +61

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

you know what they say... hydrate or die

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops