What did the school bully get for his birthday? Beaten by his alcoholic father. Children are a product of their environment and his father's abusive nature towards his son forced the young boy to act out in class giving him the reputation of a bully.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

What's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? Aye, ye be thinkin' it to be "ARRRR" - but it be the C

what did the hobo do when he saw timmy get hit by the bus and drop his ice cream? stole the ice cream and laughed

Two blondes are walking down the street. One breaks her left high heel and the other is called Monica.

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

What is colourful and explodes in the air. I don't know but it sounds cool!

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

Patient: Doctor, will I be able to play the piano when my arm heals? Doctor: Did I not tell you? You insurance didn't cover the cost of this operation. Your arm is never going to be healed!

What has four wheels and can fly? A flying car What else has four wheels and can fly? Another flying car

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Q: What happened to the teenage girl and the serial rapist at Denny's around midnight? A: They both ordered the french toast Grand Slam breakfast (at Denny's, its breakfast any time!!).

What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

My grandmother always use to tell me "slow and steady wins the race." Well, that was before she died in a house fire.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

What do you get when you a bunch of women and men with a high sex drive? A group of men and women with a high sex drive.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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