A man walks into a bar. It hurt.

Why did the fat man fall faster than the skinny man? He didn't. Masses does not affect the speed of falling objects. Everything with mass and volume falls with an acceleration of 9.81m/s^2 on Earth. Therefore the greater mass of the heavier man did not affect his falling speed. Both men fell at the same speed.

Why did Jack and Jill go up the hill? To get to their house.

How did Helen Keller become blind and deaf? Scarlet fever or meningitis.

whats the main reason Mexicans have legs? so they can stand.

what smells like red paint but is blue paint?

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

(Q) Why did the little boy cross the road? (A) To get to the police officer. (Q) Why did the little boy need the police officer? (A) because he was raped.

Who is a nazi? • Theo Kingdom

What did the lawyer get for Christmas? More paper work

What's the biggest difference between the East and West Coast? About 3,000 miles.

a Jew had a small nose

why was the little girl crying? because her dad hit her.

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

What's black and not working? An old, broken piano.

What looks and sounds just like a seagull ? A seagull.

what did micheal jackson give to a young boy? -nothing micheal jackson is dead

Why did the man punch his wife? Because he was angry

How did the square become a circle? Due to the period of recession in our nation, it was found necessary to cut corners.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist -lschles

Did you see the picture of Helen Keller's father? No. Lemme Google it. Oh cool; he had a beard.

How do you stop a run-away bus? You sit down in the driver's seat and gently place your foot on the brake pedular and proceed to press it down. The brake pads, located in the calipers, will squeeze the brake discs and slow the bus eventually to stop at the crosswalk for the old lady accompanied by a young boy scout to cross the street and continue their wonderful lives.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...