What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Why was Jim fired from his job at the sperm bank? Continual absenteeism and inconsistent work.

thumb_up thumb_down -47

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One

thumb_up thumb_down +100

Q: What's the difference between an African American and a bench? A: An African American is a human being of black dissent, while a bench is an inanimate object that people sit on.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

What did the little crippled boy get for his birthday? He's an orphan so he doesn't know his birthday.

thumb_up thumb_down +72

Your mom smells so bad that she proceeded to take a shower and then didnt smell bad at all.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

A horse walks into a bar The bartender says "Haha, sucker, this is actually a glue factory" The horse is brutally slaughtered and his remains are sold for a profit as part of a glue product

thumb_up thumb_down +50

What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the doctor say to the Lawyer? I get paid more

thumb_up thumb_down +38

An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

What's a bit smaller than the tallest man in the world? The 2nd tallest man in the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What's worse than one bee sting? 2 bee stings

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

thumb_up thumb_down +14

nick toth

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What jew get for christmas? Your money.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's red and green and goes 100 mph? A car that is driving recklessly and happens to have a Christmas paint scheme.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call an Arab flying a plane? A pilot. *BOOM* Never mind, he was a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the aeroplane engine fallon the house? Because of Donnie Darko

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops