Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

you know what they say... hydrate or die

What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage

A blonde walks into a salon and says "I would like to get my golden locks trimmed." The haircutter replies "surely, just sit yourself down in that chair over there and I'll be with you momentarily." The blonde walks to the chair and sits down. When the haircutter comes over he asks her, "would you please remove your headset, I can't cut your hair while they're on." She laughs at her forgetfulness and removes them obligingly.

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on your porch? Matt.

nick toth

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Why did the women hit the telephone pole? There are many theories but one suggests that it is due to womens statistically lower cognitive spacial reasoning abilities.

Why did the woman keep getting sexually harassed while calling for her lost dog? Her dog is named "Ilovedicks."

Why did the girl buy wine? She was hosting a party for four of her closest friends.

A blonde goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "That is a worrying symptom," says the doctor, who immediately recommends the woman for a thorough psychiatric assessment.

whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

whats annoying and black? black people

What was the biggest turning point during Michael Vick's transformation from despised felon to MVP candidate? He stopped killing dogs.

what did the duck say to the chicken .nothing

What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

WOMENS RIGHTS

Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

Why didn't little jimmy get anything for Christmas? He is Jewish.

You're momma's so fat, she's got high cholesterol.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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