A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

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What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

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sometimes i take my duck a shower, i always use cold water because if i use hot water it will think im cooking it.

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A guy walks into a bar. Ouch

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A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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Why was school cancelled? Because the school was bombed.

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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A man walks into a bar. He has three drinks, then he leaves because he realizes he needs to get home because he has to get up early to go to his job in the morning.

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What makes women so mystifying and beautiful? Tits.

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Your mom is so stupid that... She often makes mistakes.

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how much wood could a wood chuck chuck? 3

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Why didn't the African kid eat lunch? He wasn't hungry.

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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Why is it hard to fool an aborted fetus? Because it wasn't born yesterday.

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What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

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Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

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What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

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One day a horse goes to a bakery store and asks the shopkeeper for a fresh loaf of bread. Surprised at the request the shopkeeper asked - White bread or whole wheat? To which the horse replied - Makes no difference cause i rode my bicycle to work yesterday.

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Whut r bacer dew? Eh muphin

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Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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GONNA

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whats worse than ten dead babies in one trashcan? one dead baby in ten trashcans

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Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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