Chuck Norris was walking down the street when he was confronted by an armed, very desperate street robber. Chuck unfortunately made the decision to defend himself, and was shot in the gut before he could complete a roundhouse kick. The robber then took his wallet and ran off, undoubtedly to buy drugs.

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What did the boy who succsesfully came out of liposection get? Diobeeties.

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What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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WOMENS RIGHTS

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

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There are 3 type of people in the world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

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What is big, green and fuzzy and if it falls out of a tree and hit you in the head, it will probably kill you? A pool table.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, why am i even talking to you?

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What runs faster than a nigger with a stolen tv? His brother with the remote

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Why did Benjamin Franklin go to the movies? Dim message, sapi message=InputBox("Find Out","Why did Benjamin Franklin Go To the Movies?") Set sapi=CreateObject("sapi.spvoice") sapi.Speak message

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Why was the gorilla crying? His brother died

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A three legged dog walks into the bar and says, " I'm lookin' for the man that shot my paw." The bartender replies, "Your father was an honorable man, and I wish I could help."

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whats worse than finding 30 babies nailed to 30 trees? finding coal in your stocking at christmas.

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Got milk? No.

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What do you call a retarded man? Mentally challenged.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What do you call a woman with a penis? A Hermaphrodite.

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Why was the blonde so stupid? He had dyslexia and to make fun of his hardship would truly be a hardship of human morals.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke her face (pokerface)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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