I Wish... I was Charlie Sheen's Dealer

what the hell happened to your face

(insert antijoke here

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: Knock Knock. B: ... A: I guess nobody's home. (leaves.)

What's invisible and smells like a carrot? A rabbit's fart.

Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

how do you wake lady gaga up? you hit her in the face with a frying pan

Why was six afraid of seven? Fishsticks

A man walks into a bar He says ouch

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "How'd you open the door?"

how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

A mother and father heard their young son sobbing in his room, so they ran upstairs to see what the problem was. When they got to his room, they found the older son was dead and hanging from the ceiling. And the younger son was actually laughing, not crying.

Whats red and cant fly a plane. An apple.

nick toth

What does chuck norris do at 4 o clock in the morning ? Sleep

Boom.

What's black without keys. A keyboard after you hit it with a shovel.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? Because it Died

An English man a Scotts man and an Irish man buy a helicopter between them,they go to pick it up after paying for it and realise that non of them can fly it. so they get a refund and go to the pub.

Duke: Hi Sally: Hello Duke: Nice weather huh? Sally: I couldn't tell ya duke, I'm not a meteorologist.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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