How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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A muslim checks in at an airport and gets on a plane. He reads a book about knitting, gets off the plane at France and goes back to his job as a librarian.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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women's rights

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Why was Jenny walking home alone from school? Because three years ago her parents were murdered brutally by a drug dealer and social services haven't yet realised that Jenny is still living in the empty house.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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An Asian, Burnett, and a Blond are stranded on an island. They all say, "What the crap?! How'd I get on this island?!"

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That's a lie, buffaloes are extinct now

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you know what they say... hydrate or die

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Dylan Eichas

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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Q: What do you call a pakistani that practices medice? A: Doctor

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what do you call a grown man driving a plane you dont it isnt possible to drive a plane

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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what did one lady say to another lady? we are both ladies

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What has two legs and graduated from ninja school? Okyrin Sakajuru. He also went on to win two all city titles and roundhouse kick of the day, performed on a wild tiger. As time passes, he stops practicing and becomes a lethargic street criminal. He is eventually captured by local authorities and charged with the robberies and two counts of aggravated assault. Leaving his children behind to the system where they are neglected and depressed about their fathers situation. He makes bail after 3 months and opens a strip club for dwarfs but loses it all after not finding stripper poles that are dwarf friendly.

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what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

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What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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Three men are on a plane*. (*Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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Q. What's the difference between dead babies and celebrities? A. Nobody likes celebrities.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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