Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs swimming? Drowning.

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What do you call something you should prepare yourself for when having sex with a prostitute? A.I.D.S

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Burger King cashier: Are you on Team Jacob or Team Edward? Man: I'm on team I'm freaking hungry; now give me my food!

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

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a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

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Why didn't the dog like baseball? Being a dog, it had no idea or interest in what baseball is.

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Whats red and you can't see it? No Tomatoes

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vn[oiaehsobv[khpogjglprljffknfsiphgeknkldfekageriyreojgyperogerpojregkeporg? cuase u stupid and this stupid joke is to

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What did the blind, deaf, quadriplegic boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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your mama is so stupid i believe she will have a difficult time finding employment in these rough economic times

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I like my coffee like i like my woman, Without a penis.

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17

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Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

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Two people on a boat, Pete and Repete. Pete fell off and Repete radioed the Coast Guard, who sadly got there just in time to watch him drown to his death.

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women's rights

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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You just threw a fireman and a baby out of a skyscraper... who arrived earth first? Adam and Eve. Moral: Because theology is bullshit.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeline McCann.

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Why did Windows crash ? F*ck Windows, that's why.

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Dylan Eichas

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hey, can you answer a question for me? yeah, sure. ThankYou!

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What jew get for christmas? Your money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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