What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

what does a blue watermelon and a cactus that looks like a penis have in common? orange ya glad i didn't say banana!

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

A married man takes the ring off his finger.

Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

Lol, listen, the suggestion lies in the "not not", you are using not twice in your mind, which under trance makes it so your subconcious registers that you are using a double negative while you consciously do not. Look back at the messages and register consciously that you and I have been using "not not" twice during the past messages, when the net shuts down here, you reinforce the "I will totally notnot, tell him" so the suggestion just gets stronger.

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

why do holocasut jokes make us laugh? i dont know you tell me

What do you call a Mexican jumping fences? A really good athlete.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

A monkey enters a bar and climbs up on a stool. The bartender asks, "What'll ya have, pal?" The monkey, who can niether speak nor understand English, appears slightly perplexed.

What did andy say when he went down on burger nips? Welcome to the jungle

What did zero say to ten? I see you found someone

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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