How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Your mama's so old that typical places of business grant her the senior citizen discount.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

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A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can people stop posting grammatically incorrect jokes on here. Half of the sentences do not make sense.

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Roses are red violets are blue poems don't have to rhyme..... Refrigerator

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a black guy walks into a bar and the bartender says "get out of here, whites only" this joke takes place in the 1950's when african americans were discriminated against

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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Knock knock. Who's ther? Your friend Billy i've been shot and need help

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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Why'd I have sex with your mom? I'm your father and I love your mother very much

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Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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SNAPPLE!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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