if you are what you eat then you're a hamburger

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Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Stab her in the stomach so all the acidic contents of her stomach slowly burn her flesh.

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Why did the blonde driver crossed the red light? Because she has a good notion of physics and realized that the truck that was behind her was too fast to stop in time and if she braked there could have been an accident.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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a

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Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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Why did the man walk into the bar? He wast thirsty.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Two monkeys are having sex. They both realize they're boys.

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how do you know if a black man's been on your computer it's gone

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A little boy asked his mom what fucking was, so she showed him.

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Your moma's so fat, she's got type 2 diabetes

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Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops