How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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What do you get when you cross a blonde with Nickelodon? You get Dora because she is allways telling you what to do.

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

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how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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What's 2+2? It's certainly not 1.

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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hi, im sober.

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What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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Why a warm-harted man turned into cold-blooded? He's dead

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why was the panda sent to prison? he played a major roll in the bombing of 9-11

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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a dog walk into a landmine, he exploded.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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