Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

Why didn't Tommy walk to school? 'Cause he was in a wheelchair..

How do you know when Taylor Swift is dead? When you don't hear Boyfriend songs anymore

Invisible Television.

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

Why did the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a truck

Q1:Why was the homeless man homeless? A1:He suffered from a series of mentally disabilitating diseases. From a young age these disabilities went unnoticed and untreated. They evolved to a level in which he believes he is god, therefore he throws fescues at passing automobiles. Q2:Why does the homeless man throw poo at cars? A2:See answer 1

Q: What comes after 8? A: 9

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

Wanna here a joke? Womens rights

What is matt dalys favorite thing in the world? penis

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber and One Direction? A bunch of gay pop stars.

A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

A seal walks into a club...

Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Q. What is worse than being British???? A. Not being British

Why are black people more athletic than whites? Black people originate from Africa, where they lived in a world where athletic ability created natural selection. The most athletic were able to escape dangers of the jungle such as dangerous animals, and were also most apt to find food to survive. Then when the slave trade occured, only the strongest and best fit survived the trip to America and the hard labor. Also, given the socio-economic trends of the United States, African Americans are more likely to grow up in an environment where they have limited opportunity to make a living, besides professional sports, so they play cheap sports like basketball.

What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

A quadrapeldgic walks no where

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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