What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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Take My Wife- Because as it stands, I'm having frequent, toe-curling, unprotected sex with your wife. And that just doesnt seem fair.

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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A 65 year old man is tired with his life. He begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. He wants no part in the world anymore so he decided to commit suicide. On his way to commit suicide, he comes across a magical man that has an extraordinary offer. This magical man has offered to grant the 65 year old man the power to fly. The 65 year old man, accepts the offer in great interest, but the magical man wants something in return for his deed. The 65 year old man, offers all the money in his wallet to the magical man. The magical man accepts his offer of all the money and continues. With a flick of the wrist, the magical man says, "fly, fly, high as the sky, i grant this man the ability to fly". The 65 year old man is greatly excited now that he has the ability to fly. He cant wait to try out his new power. He runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. Too bad the "magical man" was really a male prostitute that was broke and homeless. The 65 year old man died on impact and the male prostitue walked away with a wallet full of cash.

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My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

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how do you kill a bear. -you shoot it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because him and his girlfriend were in a bad relationship and he needed to get away for a while.

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

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Womens rights

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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roses are red, violets are blue. Barack Obama says, nice to meet you.

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Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

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What's worst than getting glass stuck in your foot? Rubbing lotion on a fork.

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lol this is the best joke ever!

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How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What do you call two men riding a bicycle.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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