what do you say when you see a winner weaner

Rich people gave money to charity Charity gave money to the homeless The homeless spent the money on drugs

Girls go to college to get more knowledge. Boys go to Jupiter because they're already smart enough to achieve interplanetary space travel.

A seal walks into a club...

How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

Why is One direction the best thing in the world? Becuz when 5 hot guys met each other they... Sorry I got lost in Zayn's eyes again! Now what were we talking about??????

how long does it take for a black woman to shit? a couple of minutes.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

Why does a black man break into a car? Because he had closed the windows and locked his keys inside.

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

Why did little Timmy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

Hey, I just met you and i am crazy, but? here's my room key let's make a baby.

Snapple fact #572: You're a terrible person.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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