A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An insane individual walks into a bank and asks for $500. The teller refuses since he doesn't have an account, so the individual pulls out a gun and asks the teller again. The teller presses the silent panic button, causing the cops to show up and arrest the gunman, but not before he manages to shoot the teller and the small child standing next two counters over.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did girl cry? Because she recently saw the messy demise of her parent's marriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you kill a blonde ? Shoot her in the head

thumb_up thumb_down -6

who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Q: If I have 13 icecubes, and you have 12 icecubes, how many pancakes can I fit on the roof? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats worse than a dead baby at the bottom of a trash can? Two dead babies. Whats worse then that 5 dead babies and worse then that? Im starting to have suspicions of you being a mass murdurer of small children.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Hey i just met you & this is crazy but Nia and Goober Made a baby

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

What the difference between a black man and a pizza? A black man is capable of feeding a family. A pizza is capable of feeding an American.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why can't blondes change a lightbulb? Because they're women

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why did the priest touch the little boy? To Baptise him.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

187

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Do you know the joke about the two guys who went to Paris ? Me neither.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An irishman walks out of a pub

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why were the babies used for target practice? Hitler demanded the Nazis to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops