Q: What did the first kid say to the second kid before he handed him a pencil? A: May I have a pencil?

A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

When life throws you lemons, duck because they freakin' hurt.

how many indians does it take to screw in a light bulb? one if it can reach 2 if it's high.One to screw in the bulb the other to hold the ladder.

A women go hit by a car, what everyone woners though, how did the car get in between the bedroom and the kitchen?

Johnny has 30 pints of ice cream. He eats 25 pints. What does Johnny have? Diabetes. Johnny has diabetes.

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They enjoy a few quiet drinks while watching a rugby match between Italy and France on the big screen, which is why they came into this particular bar. The Englishman hopes Italy will win, the Irishman is also supporting Italy while the Scotsman is up for France. France wins the match and the Scotsman says "Good game lads eh?" The others agree.

Roses are gray violets are gray everything is gray because I'm color blind.

your moms fat. she's ugly too.

What's worse than Hell? The Holocaust.

Knock Knock. Martha, get the door I'm watching the game!

An irishman walks out of a pub

Why did the chicken cross the road? The pen was left open, and it felt slightly curious.

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

A man walks into a bar and says "Hi everybody, it's me!" So everybody turns round. But it wasn't him.

How do you make a black man cry? A: Kill his whole family.

Oxygen and magnesium are going out OMG Think science the you might get it If not O oxygen mg magnesium

What do you call something that comes out of a llama's butt? poop

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

my bubbles!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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