Why couldn't the dog fetch? It's back legs were useless after it got run over.

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A doctor walks into a room after a woman has just given birth to her baby Doctor: I've got some good news and some bad news Mom: Whats the bad news? Doctor: Your Baby is Ginger. Mom: So what's the good news? Doctor: It's dead.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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why does crazy george spin a ball on his fingers well? because he has a huge dingo

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how are a plum and a rabbit the same? they are both purple except the rabbit

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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whats worse than having cancer? nothing you have cancer and should proceed to see doctor

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Robin, get in the Bat-mobile!

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The sun was burning as the Elephant offered the mouse to walk between the sun and the mouse so the mouse could get some shade. Mouse: Lets switch places so you can have some shade too! Elephant: Good idea! Just then unexpectedly the elephant slipped on a banana peel and tilted towards the mouse. Squish. Moral: The reason they never tell kids the full story... for real.. honest...

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Yo mama's so fat that I make Yo Mama jokes about her!!

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

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What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

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What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

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Whats pink and looked like an angry bulldog? Your moms vagina last night

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I like my woman like I like my coffee. Ground up and in the freezer.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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What did the chicken say to the rhino? Nothing. Animals can't talk.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Why did Dumbledore fall off the astronomy tower? Because Snape killed him.

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A French, an American and a Belgian are going together on holidays. I hope they'll have good weather.

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Lean a ladder against the tree and reassure them if they are apprehensive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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