What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

How did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats the difference between a circle and a peace sign? Three lines!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hi.... bonjour... hola... DOOO YOUUUU UNDERSTANDDD MEEE !!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's brown and smells Iike crap? My brother he doesn't shower and is Hispanic

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did Jack give Jill for Christmas? Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the girls head explode while eating supper? There was a grenade in her food.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Two blondes are sitting in a car. They took a drive and later enjoyed turkey sandwiches at the local eatery.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Wanna hear a dirty joke? I had gay butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -58

What's worse than dying? Living in Africa

thumb_up thumb_down -66

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -124

Never mail in your wishes to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +123

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did the tractor say to the cow? I'm a tractor, you're a cow, go figure.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between mw2 and mw3? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -79

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops