Why wouldn't the girl clean her room? She was paralyzed.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

My mom told me about a funnel they make for women now that they can use to pee standing up. I told her it was a ploy to promote feminism.

What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Their names, if you know them. If not just say "excuse me"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it's a chicken and it doesn't know any better. It probably doesn't know where it is much less where it's going.

a blind man walks into a bar it hurt.

Q: How did Muhamid Ali ( casius clay ) get a black eye? A: He was born

A Man goes into a watch store. Why? To buy a watch

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms.

how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

Q: why did the girl fall off the swing?? A: because she had no arms or legs.

What happened to the prisoner who dropped the soap while in the shower with other men? Another prisoner picked up and gave it to him and finished showering and felt squeaky clean.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, penis.

A 55-year-old white man's car is broken, so he decides to take a bus to work that morning. His bus arrives and he gets on. Then he notices the driver's a woman. He pays for his ticket, takes a seat by the window and in about an hour he gets to his office.

roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

this site is funny.

Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

A white man and a black man are standing on the edge of a 20 story building. The view from up there is rather nice.

What do you call a guy who has sex with kids? A child molester

Why did Nicholas Cage cross the street? To steal the Declaration of Independence.

a guy who can fly walks up a hill and jumps off a cliff. his flying power fails him and he dies on impact

Knock, knock. The man knocking finds a note taped to the door saying "we'll be back in a week", the man proceeds to walk back home and tell his wife that they weren't home and that he'll return the rake he borrowed from them next week when they're back.

Why was the manspenis big Cause he was a lucky bastard

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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