why did Stevie Wonder run a stop sign? he was changing his CD's and missed it.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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Did you hear about the blonde who jumped out off a bridge? She was clinically depressed and took her own life because of her terribly low self-esteem.

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japan4.

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What did the rock say to the other rock? It didnt

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Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

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Why don't cannibals eat clowns? Clowns do not populate the area in which cannibals reside

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Hey buddy what's up? I justed wanted to know if you wanted to hang out tonight. Just call me and tell me what you wanna do. Ok that's it see ya. Oh yeah! I gave your mom an STD...sorry dude...it just happened. I hope your dad isn't mad. Again, really sorry. Ok bye.

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You wanna hear an inside joke? That was one of them.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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How do Elmer Fudd take a shower? Without a shampoo, he's bald..

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Person 1: What's 2+2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: Oh, you already heard that one.

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how did the bloop cross the road? to get to the other side

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Why couldn't the Hispanic guy become a firefighter? Because the fire chief was racist.

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A man walks into a store and asks for a loaf of bread.

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What do you call ten black men running down the street? A race.

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How did the black guy cross the street? He jumped it.

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Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

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What happens if someones forgets to put the 'anti' next to 'joke.' It is taken by someone else and created into an anti Joke.

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Why did lil yazzy watch The Hills at 12:40 in the morning? Because she was casually surfing netflix and clicked on it.

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What happened to the blind man who went skydiving? Nothing but the dog was unlucky.The dog kept squirming and he thought he hadnt gone down the cliff yet and said "ok fine dont come with me!".The dog didnt survive. :'(

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? I had gay butt sex.

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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