i did not type this on 12/23/11 at 8:49:47

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Always bring food to the zoo. It's not the animals who placed the signs not to feed them.

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What do you get when you mix a dog and a cow blood everywhere

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Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Gravitational force acted upon the monkey who was not holding on to any branch.

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Why dont we just make fun of both? *mexican music plays*

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Leukemia

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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-Is Michael Jackson dead? - HELL YEAH HE'S DEAD!!

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What's black and white and red all over. An interracial suicide pact.

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how much blow can charlie sheen hold up his nose? enough to kill Two and A Half Men

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Q: What do you call a black person that flies planes? A: A pilot you racist

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Q : Why was the little girl crying? A : Because she tripped and hurt her knee.

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yo mama so dumb that we sat her down to take a standardized, comprehensive IQ test measuring spatial, logical, linguistic, and memorization abilities. Her aggregate score was an 87, indicated she is roughly one standard deviation below the mean of the population, which is not low enough to qualify for government assistance under the Americans with Disabilities Act (1990) but does impede her understanding of more complex abstract concepts and things pertaining to higher culture. In spite of this, she has raised a child of average intelligence, and has retained the same job at Walgreen's for 14 years, People seem to like her because she is polite and rarely late. Your mother is an inspiration to low-IQ people living in high-IQ developed countries, demonstrating that an inability to fully understand abstracts does necessarily lead to a life of meagerness and frustration, so long as you work hard, keep your spirits high, and accept Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior.

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Why did the girl fall off the couch? She had a seizure.

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There are two muffins in the oven. One muffin says to the other "phew it's kinda hot in here" the other muffin says "AWW a talking muffin!"

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So a Jewish man walks into a bar, You think Jesus being all knowing would have realized it was there.

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GIVE

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In Soviet Russia, there are communists.

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what's the difference between a duck? one leg is the same.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when riding on a roller coaster.

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

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A: Knock knock! B: A: Guess no one's home.

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What's the difference between shoes and a ginger? Shoes do the kicking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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