A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face." the horse says "my wife has terminal cancer."

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Why did the mammoth cross the road? For financial reasons.

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How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

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someone called a frog a frog

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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Guy 1: "Hey, you have some updawg on your face." Guy 2: "Oh, thanks. Did I get it?" Guy 1: "Yeah, I think so."

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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How do you get a small girl of a swing ? Throw a fridge at her

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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Yo mama is so fat that it is obvious obesity runs in the family.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems rhyme this one doesn't

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Q:What colors make black? A:Nothing Thats a Shade

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What is the best way to avoid wrinkles as you age? Moisturise with a good quality moisturiser, use high factor suncream on the face, get plenty of sleep, drink plenty of fluids, wear a hat and sunglasses and stay in the shade between 11am and 3pm, and try to eat a diet that is heart-healthy (for example, wholegrain, oily fish, and/or flax seed), as heart failure over a long time leads to sagging skin with a loss of elasticity.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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smug face >:}

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if I had sex with your mother?

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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Q: How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One, possibly two if the lightbulb is high up and someone has to hold the ladder.

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a

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a plum? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a terrorist.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops