Two muffins are in an oven. Muffin 1: Gosh it's hot in here. Muffin 2: Holy Crap! A talking muffin!

What's green and invisible? This cabbage

whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

What did the adverb say to the noun? Hopefully whale.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

Knock Knock Who's there? Doctor. Doctor who? What? No? I'm here to inform you that your child won't be coming out of that coma, I'm sorry.

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

hi, im sober.

What's red, blue, green, yellow, pink, purple, orange, teal, light green, brown, black and white? Colours, except for black and white, for they are the absence and amalgam of all colours, respectively.

A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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