Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What happens 2 seconds after you thorw a rock out a two-story window? The rock hits the ground.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you call a deaf man? It would be unwise to call him anything, as he would have difficulty hearing you.

thumb_up thumb_down -51

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

thumb_up thumb_down +92

What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What's the difference between an old man and a child? The old man is older than the child

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man get a life sentence in prison? Because he was involved a mass stabbing in a night club London which saw 4 local teenage girls lose there lives.

thumb_up thumb_down

Arron Glass

thumb_up thumb_down -8

How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops