Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

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How do you kill a blonde? A gun, knife, there are a number of ways really...

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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What is the difference between peanut butter andd jam! Jam is made from crushed fruit and gelatine while peanut butter is made from finely ground peanuts and is often sweetened with sugar.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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How do you divide 2574 by 23.5 WIth a calculator

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What is worse than getting a 30% on a test? Getting a 29% on a test.

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What do you call thousands of people starving all across the globe? Not my problem.

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How was copper wire invented? Probably some scientist did that

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What did the Dyslexic man write on his Christmas card? Merry Christmas

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I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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I hate girls that try to act hard. Like calm down you dont got a dick.

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What's green and invisible? This cabbage

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So three Mexicans, a black man, and 2 white men enter a room. They promptly sever their penises and jump out the window because they are all members of a strange cult.

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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