A man walks in to a bar. He was hospitalized and died later that day.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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Arsonist: Hey, did you listen to my mixtape? ... It's really good.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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what did the teacher say to the kid? you failed the kid cried.

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A horse walks into a bar. The owner immediately seeks out the owner of the misplaced obstruction and asks them to remove it promptly less his animal suffers any more untoward damage

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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im gay because im gay

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road Because he did

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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SNAPPLE!

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How are a duck and a tri-cycle the same? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

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do you know a really good joke? i don't have one.

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what did one farmer say to the other farmer we are farmers

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A man enters a bar, and says: "It is impossible to drown in an elevator" This is incorrect.

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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