Why did robin get in the batmobile? Batman told him to

Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

What do you tell a black man walking down the street with a suspicious look to him. Hey, how's it going?

what did the 35 year old man say when he walked in his home last night? Nothing, he started crying because he saw that someone had viciously killed his guinea pig.

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have a few drinks, then go to a club, where they amuse each other and those around them by completely slurring their words in their already very strong regional accents. Then they get a taxi back to the house of the Englishman as he lives nearest, and stay the night. The next morning, the Scotsman and the Irishmen walk home as they are still hungover and do not wish to risk driving.

Why couldn't the boy see? He was dead

How's a raven like a writing desk. you really are alice.

That moment when you and your friends throw snowballs at cars in the dark on the highway and the cops spotlight your area while you hide in a shed...

A man rubs a magic lamp nothing happens

A woman walks up to her man and asks him to take out the trash. He agrees and takes the trash out.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It didn't, a cookie is a food, therefore it doesn't have working organs.

A man ingested a hamburger. It proved fatal due to a tomato allergy.

A man walks into a bar... ouch. He received a minor concussion from the impact of the cement wall, and a slight goose egg on his forehead.

Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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