What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

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So there are two elephants in a bathtub. Elephant 1: "yo can you pass the shampoo" Elephant 2: "radio!"

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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187

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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A: How do you make a fire with two sticks? B: Ask your mother, we did it last night.

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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Why didn't the 13 year old Black boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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A black guy and a white girl are walking toward each other in a dark alley. Which one takes off his/her clothes first? The black guy as he is closer to home and therefore closer to his bathroom where he took a shower after a hard day's work.

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Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

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Why did the bear stick his head in the honey comb? He wanted honey.

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Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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