A baby seal walks into a club...

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How many boring people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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POOP FART BUTTS HAHAHA!!!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm a scizophrenic, Or at least thats what the voices tell me.

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How the hell did Susie get on the swing anyway I don't know you tell me?

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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Whats white, black, and red all over? A half eaten penguin

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What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

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Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Ones fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other one is a watermelon.

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An alcoholic walks into a bar. He is destroying his family.

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To mamas so fat shes fat

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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how do you put a giraffe in a fridge? open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. how do you put an elephant in a fridge? open the door, take out the giraffe, put the elephant in and close the door. the lion king is holding a conference in the jungle and all the animals turn up except for one, which animal is missing? the elephant, it's in the fridge. you come across a river you need to cross, but it is infested with man-eating crocodiles, how to you cross the river without dying? just swim across, all the crocodiles are at the conference.

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Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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It's not just me bomber, Kane Aodhan and kevin are all posting stuff too so SBB!!!

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if a bra is called a over the shoulder boulder holder what is male underware called sincerly, under the butt nut hut

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What did Pittsburgh say to Philadelphia? .........Lightbulb.........

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Knock Knock Come in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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