Person A: Hey! Whats up? Person B: Suicide rates...

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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LIKE THIS!

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it all started when it all started when i was born because i was the resault of a broken condom and thats why he left. shortly after my mother killed herself. well thats the way the cookie crumbles. its not a joke i just needed to tell someone.

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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Why did the mouse cross the road, and then go down it? It tried to get cheese on the other side, but got hit by a SUV and was stuck to the wheels. The rat on the wheel goes "Squish, Scratch,, Mush........

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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find the meme pepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepepe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why did the jew drop his coin? beacuse a nazi killed him before he put it in his pocket

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Why did the taxi driver kill the blond? He didn't. It's illegal to murder people in most countries.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Lame Anti Jokes.

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they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

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why didnt the mouse go for the cheese on the mouse trap it is proven that mice dont actually really like cheese all that much.

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Three men are on a plane. (Note, that this is a low-altitude plane, in which they are allowed to open the windows) The stewardess offers the first man refreshments. He asks for an orange. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his orange, he throws it out the window. The stewardess moves on to the second man, who asks for an apple. The stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. Also confused, the man complies, and upon receiving his apple, he throws it out the window. Finally, the stewardess moves onto the third man, who asks for a bomb. Without question, the stewardess agrees, on one condition: that he throws it out the window. With no reaction, the man receives the bomb, then throws it out the window. Upon landing, the first man sees a woman crying. With a sympathetic heart, he asks what's the matter. She replies, "I was walking down the street, and an orange came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man brushes the event off as a coincidence. The second man sees another woman crying. Upon asking her what's the matter, she replies, "I was walking down the street, and an apple came from the sky and hit me in the head." The man, confused, apologizes and walks away. The third man sees a woman hysterically laughing. Intrigued, he inquires her jolly. She manages to state through her hysteria, "When me fart, me whole house blow up!"

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You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

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What happened to the peanut who went to New York City? He got a-salted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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