What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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How are a bucket and a purple shovel alike? Coincidentally they both are registered sex offenders.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

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What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

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There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

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Why did the man murder his wife in cold blood? Because she was alive before he killed her.

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Two white people walk into a bar what do they say? "hi"

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Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

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Sometimes I light my hair on fire and pretend I'm a candle.

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pliot.

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A young boy is concerned about his fathers health, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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Arron Glass

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Yo momma so fat she was baptized in a church, because she wasn't as fat as she is currently.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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