am i invited to party? no

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whats green can fly and has legs? a plane i lied about the legs

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Sarah Palin walks into a bar and the bartender tells her to get the f*&k out.

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Why did the wiener dog fight the cock. Because it was a cock-fight.

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Why did the Black man drown? Because he could not and did not know how to swim. Because he could not afford the lessons to learn how to swim. Because he does not have the financial means to afford a lesson in swimming. Because he is of a low socio-economic level.

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Why is the turkey always full? Because he is stuffed.

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whats small and looks funny? A baby with a penis sewed to its face.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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how long has dibey got left like :)

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what did the blind santa say to the jewish child jewish people don't believe in santa...awkward.

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Por que não passa Globo Esporte na Etiópia? Porque a Rede Globo não tem afiliadas por lá.

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I heard you like playing basketball at night. My ears are fully functional in comprehension of human language and therefore I am able to listen and remember words that are told by others.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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What do you get when you cross and elephant and a dog? Nothing, because you cannot breed creatures of different geniuses.

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

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Arron Glass

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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How do you make a man sad? By drowning him in a Bede.

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who wins a race a white guy or a black guy? depends who's faster

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When Life throws you lemons you might be hallucinating

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Knock knock. It's me, the ratboy genius.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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