"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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what did the gay guy get for his birthday aids

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Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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A fat man takes a crap, it looked like something a rhino would curl out.

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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What happens when Chuck Norris jumps off the 3rd floor. He falls to the ground and hurts himself badly

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Whats brown and sticky? A massive shit.

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How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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ey can i pick your scabs plzz

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What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

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An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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Why did the koala bear fall out of the tree? Because it's dead.

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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