How do you make a dead baby float? -you take your foot off its head.

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

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Your mother is so good in the kitchen that we all asked for a second helping.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Grass is green, Trees are brown.

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Everyone is special in there own ways except for patrick whos demented

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Just call the fire department, they're trained for that kind of stuff

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Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

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Q:How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A:Just Juan.

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There's a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead who sit next to each other in college. They are good students and regularly do their homework.

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What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A package, the UPS man is already back in his truck.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Cause he's dead.

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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hi, im sober.

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Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

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OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

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A n antelope walks into a bar and many people leave for the sake of their safety and animal control gets called to escort the antelope out of the bar.

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Michael J. Fox asked me if I wanted my drink shaken or stirred, did I really have a choice?

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

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a women walks into a room and says she got a good job..wait thats not possible..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops