What's the difference between a joke and an anti joke Bananas

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Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one. Lady Gaga has a small one. Madonna doesn't have one. What is it? A last name.

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Oh

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Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

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What's black, and hangs from trees in my backyard? Blackberries

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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Justin Bieber.

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Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

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What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

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Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

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*Tell your listener to say knock knock* B: Knock knock A: Who's there? B: *awkward silence

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Want to hear a funny joke? Sure. Women's Rights. That's not even a joke. You don't get it. It's not even a sentence.

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What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

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A sheep goes up to to a horse and asks "Does you speak sheep?".The horse replies ''Neigh''.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't because he wasn't capable of having emotions after he fell into a coma and died 10 months ago after a severe car crash involving a drunk driver. The believed driver,3 had a blood alcohol of .26 and rear ended 6's car at 60 mph. 3 was uninjured and promptly arrested but....6 wasn't so lucky. The doctors said there was no chance of him coming back and they pulled the plug.He was only 9 days away from his 32nd birthday. The funeral was held shortly after, 7 seemed the most upset and couldn't hold back the tears well enough to make it through the whole service. The family is now forever scarred. In Loving Memory of 6 February 22,1982-February 13,2014 Loving father, Caring husband, Forever in our hearts

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Why did Tesco not serve a black guy? Because he just happen to be holding a gun

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

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what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

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How Do Bulls Drive Cars? They cant, they have hooves making it impractical for a Bull to Drive a car.

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Sarah Palin

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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