Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Want to hear a joke? I'm sorry.

OneBigAssMistakeAmerica

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

what is worse then stubbing your toe in the dark? -september 11th

Why did the beach ball pop? Because it stepped on a sharp chocolate chip cookie!

Q. Where do snowmen keep their money? A. A snowman is an anthropomorphic snow sculpture made of frozen water. They therefore cannot earn, keep or have any use for money.

oliver is gay. so much so that he has hex with other men and dosent mind it very much

What does Rubens Barrichelo does with his F1 championship trophies? He never got one.

Why can't a T-Rex clap? Because they're extinct

What happen to the ginger after he posted a joke? He was put in jail for 6 months, and analy raped in prision!

Knock Knock Who's There? God God who.....wait REALLY? No Dave, this is a hallucination, and your peeing right now.

you want to hear a joke? the goverment.

Where's Justin Beiber? With his girlfriend.

What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

Why did the girl pee her pants? She was only 1 month old...

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

What is the easiest way to babysit a black kid? Find an activity that you can both relate to and enjoy. Hopefully after doing this for a while, the youngster will become tired and fall asleep. You can then watch TV, read or talk on your cell phone until his or her parents get home.

What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

A Mexican, a Jew and an African walk into a bar. Now, it seem it was the Jew's turn to pay for drinks. So, all three ordered drinks, and the Jew paid for them.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer Pressure.

Q: What did Micheal Jackson Say to the boys? A: He can't speak because he's dead.

What did the boy say to the Vietnam veteran? Where are your legs?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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