Nah, its fine, I just went to get a popsicle, and its square, so don't get any ideas. Honestly? When I first met "some jerk" calling himself Nero here, I began calling myself Nero, because I thought that the jerk that turned out to be you, Nero himself, sigh. was screwing over his own reputation. But now I realize that what makes you who you are, is that you say whats on your mind without going "oh no what will others think about me, what if this or that happens", you accept yourself for who you are, and if the rest do not, well screw them right? As you told me at first and proved to me during our conversations, you respect and value individuality and integrity. And well, you are a guy, you think like a guy (I honestly dont think we girls think that differently, we are simply socially indoctrinated or "engineered" in order to think that we do), I mean let me say something really honest here. Nero, I only dare say this once, so take me seriously I really want you to fuck me, and yeah, I may say that when we meet too, considering I have not even said it yet, just in my head... Anyway, its not something I am insecure about nor ever was and blahblahblah, the end, oh, and yeah, I really want and need a friend like you.

Man: Docter it hurts when i touch my legs! Docter: yeah you have two shattered knee caps youll never walk again.

So a black man, an Italian, a Mexican, an Irishman, a Chinese man, and a Jew walk into a bar. They go their separate ways and never see each other again.

whats brown, lying in a ditch, and is covered in cookie crumbs? a girl scout that got hit by a truck

What's The Difference Between a Chicken and a Human. Well a Chicken Is A Chicken and a Human Is a Human.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

why did the bear eat meat? he was hungry

whats 2+2? gonorrhea.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

What do you call a black guy going into mcdonalds A great opportunity to make a raciest joke

What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

What was the pirate movie rated? It was rated R for its graphic depiction of the continuing violence in Somalia.

How many dead lions can feed a bluejay? Bluejays don't eat dead or living lions, so this is highly improbable.

What do you call a black man and a white woman who are married? A married couple

What do you do when you find a robber holding a 19 pound sack of poultry? Think life through and try to find out how you had this coming.

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She had previously been in a car accident, in which all of her close family died and she was the only survivor. Since both her arms were stuck in between crushed components of the car, they had to be amputated on the spot. She was testing out the prosthetic arms she had been given when they failed, causing her to get a concussion, and putting her in a coma for the rest of her life.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

whats the problem with black and mexican jokes? once youve heard juan youve heard jamal

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? The answer is not definitive and involves several factors including the size of the woodchuck, the woodchuck's teeth, the climate in which that woodchuck lives, and the tenacity of that particular woodchuck at achieving his goal.

What will Postman Pat be called after he retires? Pat.

What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

What has 4 legs and goes "meow." A cat. Dang! You already heard it.

Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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