What goes about 36 miles per hour and screams? A baby attached to a ceiling fan.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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What do you call a Black pilot? A pilot! What else would you call him, racist!

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light-bulb? I'm melting!

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POOP FART BUTTS HAHAHA!!!!

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What's brown and sticky? a stick

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how long has dibey got left like :)

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What did the girl fruit say to the boy fruit when he wanted to marry her? "No."

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Why did Billy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus

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Whats white and all over my room? paint

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Fat people.

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hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

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Your friend is so blonde that when she was born she had no hair but overtime it grew out and became blonde.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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