why did the boy fall down? he was shot

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What happened to the guy that fell off the building? He hit the ground

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

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Why did the car slam its brakes on? There was a infant under the bonnet.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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call of duty world at war

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

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What did Jerry Sandusky do when he was alone with 3 little boys? Taught them how to play football.

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Where is my tractor?

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?". The horse doesn't respond because it neither speaks nor understands English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on the way.

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Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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