Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

From a picture, it is difficult to tell the difference between an apatosaurus and a diplodocus.

Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

How many polish people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -One

Roses are Red Violets are Blue And you will be too when i'm done with ya

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She didn't have arms.

Why was the Nazi killed? for crimes against Humanity

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

A man walks into a McDonald's and proceeds to buy a burger, unfortunately a man was robbing the fast food restaurant, what did the man do. Buy a burger

Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Oranges don't talk

How are you this morning?

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

Men's Rights

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

boobs

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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