Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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So you there Red?

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Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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How are you this morning?

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If you have a green ball in your left hand and a green ball your right hand, what do you have? Kermit the Frog's undivided attention

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What do you call a gardener in Mexico? Un Jardinero.

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boobs

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The Olympics

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How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

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On a plane directed to Buffalo there are: an italian, a french and a greek. They all go there for tourism

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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A man walks into a bar. He had to leave promptly because he, according to the law, was too young to be served alcohol.

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Where is my tractor?

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops