A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

a black man jumps in a pool.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Fat people.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

thumb_up thumb_down -46

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

thumb_up thumb_down -56

Why did Sally drown? She wasn't wearing a life jacket and it was the the seventh time she had fallen off her water skis today. Her father was not coming back this time.

thumb_up thumb_down -62

How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

thumb_up thumb_down +63

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

thumb_up thumb_down +49

call of duty world at war

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why would someone smile at a tumble weed? I don't know, it's an inanimate object.And is ugly Just like the couch in the basement in That 70's Show.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why doesn't Santa come in the summer? Because it's not Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I have no soul so I must consume yours

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops