Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

A man took his son out to play catch. The boy didn't even try to catch the ball. After that the man took his son to the amusement park to have fun. The boy didn't even try to have fun. Then the man took his son to the burger place nearby. Once again the son didn't even touch his food. Finally the man lost his temper and beat his seemingly ungrateful son and cried over the fact that his son was mentally retarded.

Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

What happened after a Mexican drank 4 shots? He got drunk and died in a car accident.

What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

the other day i saw a mouse run across my floor. i said "okay" and proceeded with my life

A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Why did humpty dumpty fall off the wall? Because he was pushed.

Word play, punch-line, joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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