What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

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I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

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How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

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Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

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Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

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What is worse than burning your toast? - Obama

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I have no soul so I must consume yours

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HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

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when I shaved this morning....... hairs went down the sink

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? In most people who lie eyebrows may raise, eyes may widen and gaze may alter, anal sphincter usually tightens, breathing often quickens marginally, external body temperature alters and sweat (and therefore skin electrical conductivity) increases.

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

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What do you call a black man running down the street? A promising athlete in training.

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Why did the Turkey cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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pigs are sometimes pink GOSH

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An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

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Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops