Why does steve wonder always smile? He doesn't know he's black

Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fred. Hello Fred.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

What do you get when you mix a racoon and a human. A Smoothie

wats worse than gettin bitched at by ur mom? gettin raped by a giant scorpian n getting SUPER ULTRA MEGA AIDS

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Whats worse than breaking your pencil? Getting a cactus shoved up your ass.

How do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? Wave to her.

What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

Why don't white people do the right thing? Because we suck

When does the narwhal bacon? When the universe looses its realism to the point where every animals' meat is bacon at a certain time, and a person hunts a narwhal at the crack of dawn when there is a triple rainbow and the narwhal's DNA is combined with a pig's just long enough for the meat to be bacon when the person shoots it.

Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

So you there Red?

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No? Neither has he!

Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

What happens when you throw a penny between two Jewish men? Probably nothing, but one of them might pick it up and ask if you have dropped a penny.

What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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