If a man without hands is called a handicap, what do you call a man without legs? A handicap.

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A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Having a refrigerator fall on you

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Well, honestly I don't know how I feel about meeting you yet, or chatting with you, I never believed I would get to speak, or even less meet "The Nero", I mean as far as I know, nobody that ever worked alongside you ever has... ...By the way, the thing with the metal arm, well I don't have both arms, so yeah, story of my life. I am "Eliza" here too, its not coding, its just me sharing my real part of my life with our followers, and well, they do not make much sense out of it, but I get to share the tale about how Nero saved me, if not in person.

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How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

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call of duty world at war

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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Are you a tree? No.

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Why was the lady fat. She ate a lot of food.

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Whats 1+1? Well,According to John Willemain's Business Analysis: Problem Solving Using Calculus and Finite Mathematics it's 2.

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A man with a badly injured arm is sitting in a hospital. He says, "Doctor, when my arm heals, will I be able to play the violin?" The doctor says, "With proper medical attention and rest, yes, you will be able to." The man says, "That's great! Before I was hurt, I really enjoyed playing the violin."

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What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

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Whenever anybody asks me to help me find something they lost, I say: "Look where it is and you will find it."

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Whats white and all over my room? paint

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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