How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

what do you call a black guy who flies planes? a pilot

call of duty world at war

Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

Two astronauts go kayaking in the Sahara Desert. How many pancakes does it take to shingle doghouse? Purple, because ice cream has no bones.

I have no soul so I must consume yours

Two ducks are sitting on washcloths in the middle of a lake. One duck looks to the other and asks, "hey, do you have any soap?" to which the other duck responds, "what do you think I am, a typewriter?"

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

boobs

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

The Olympics

Fat people.

A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

How do u know someones running? They leave this????behind

How many people can you fit in an oven? A: I Don't know ask a holocaust survivor.

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

An impolite guy walks into a bar... and doesn't apologize to the bar.

Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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