Three men walked into a bar. They looked around, saw that it was pretty crowded, and decided they'd feel more comfortable going somewhere a little less busy down the road.

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whats funny with two wheels? A kid falling off his bike

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A theif walks into a blonde ladies apartment. The theif takes all of her valuable belongings, leaving her life in shambles.

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A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? "Men, get on the ship."

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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Baman: What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? Piderman: What? Baman: They're all gone!

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Har har hey

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What is green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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What did the man on a business trip to Japan say to his wife on the phone? The nuclear reactor in the next city over is melting down as we speak. If I don't see you again, I love you.

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Why was Tom flunking in school? He had a learning disability.

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Guy 1: So who did you have sex with? Guy 2: I was Fucking Austria. Guy 1: What do you mean? Guy 2: Look it up.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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