What's the difference between George W Bush and a doorknob? George W Bush is the president of the United States. A doorknob is a mechanical device that securely closes a hinged door, thereby keeping your family safe from danger.

Why can't humans fly? Because there is simply no natural way of achieving lift with the bodies that we have. We must use other means to become airborne such as planes and hot air balloons.

Yo mama is so fat, so when she jumped of a building, she died.

Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

69

What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Well, she did.

Why is a bear like a cloud? They are both blue.

The sons of modern psychology: COCAINE MOTHERF8CKERS! COMING OUT IN YOUR CINEMA RENTAL STORE YESTERDAY! Sold out. (yesterday)

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

What is it called when a black man does cocaine? A felony.

Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

How you learn to juggle? You ask someone for their balls.

If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

20

So you there Red?

What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...