Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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What is the difference in a dead dog in the road, and a dead black guy in the road? One was a dog and one was a human being..

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68

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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A priest walks into a bar, which is suprising because priests don't usually go to bars.

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That other group is a *********************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************************** From Jackson Edwards

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed!" The 14 year old yells back "Excuse me? Do you see a fvcking pickaxe?"

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What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one. He might have trouble focusing, but his ADHD in no way prevents him from completing such a task.

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Doctor, Doctor, I think I'm a canary! Yes, you are.

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Tim tebow is the anti christ

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Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

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So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had just escaped from the slaughterhouse and ran for its life.

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You know you are from New York when you live in Manhattan.

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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A rabbi, a nun, a priest, a hooker, a stripper, 2 secret servicemen, a teacher, a midget, a ginger, a rodeo clown, a nascar driver, a homosexual native american, a heterosexual native american, 2 portuguese tuba players, an african american taxi driver, a blind man, his seeing eye dog, a bartender, 2 minor league baseball players, 3 lesbian mexican salsa dance instructors and a dwarf are all in a bar. They all had a good time and the teacher and one ol the portuguese tuba players ended up becoming facebook friends.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Whats plastic and phonie a phone

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Why did the teenager write a joke on here? Because after hours of surfing this website and casually laughing at herself she realized she had no life and the only way to feel happy with her self would be submitting her own to here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops