What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

Why was the little Jewish girl sad? Because neo-Nazis killed her family.

If a tree falls in the forest and it does it make a sound? No, Trees can't talk

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

hey i just F****d u and this is crazy so delete the number and keep the baby

What's the difference between gold and silver? Atomic number

What is the main similarity of Darth Vader and Michael Jackson? They are both dead fathers.

Knock knock Who's there? The police. Your husband has been killed in an accident.

Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the fourth panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. -BG_Shank_A

"Ask me if I'm a banana." "Are you a banana?" "No."

PENIS THAT IS ALL!

An Irishman walked into a pub and ordered a pint. He had planned to just have one but ended up having two since he'd had a rough day at work. His wife was slightly annoyed that he came home smelling of beer.

iff god whas funny why thit he let your mother be raped and your sister murdered en iff satan whos a ice cream will he taste sweet ?

How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

Whats plastic and phonie a phone

Guy: If I could re-arrange the alphabet, I would put I and u together. Girl: Really because if I could r-arrange the Alphabet I would put f and u together

You might be a redneck if you are an individual a part of a low social caste in a predominately rural area such as the southern part of the United States or a mountainous area such as the Appalachians or Ozarks who may or may not partake in stereotypical activities such as hunting, fishing or farming And who also lives in possibly degraded living conditions.

Why was the baby going so fast? It was tied to a bus.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

There is an Asian, an American, and a Mexican on a falling plane. The pilot announces that the plane is plummeting out of the sky and says that he needs to drop the cargo. The pilot drops the cargo but the plane is too heavy still. The pilot tells the passengers to drop some personal belongings. The Asian drops rice, the Mexican drops his guns, and the American throws the Mexican and yells "Remember the Alamo!".

Your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you're just a figment of my imagination.\

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I was dropped on my head as a baby, kjhgfiehcgbfbjebfiuheggfcug

Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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