Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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What do you do when a bear chases you? Run.

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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Hey you want to here a joke? I can't think of one

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did it hurt when you fell from heaven? cause it looked like you landed on your face

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What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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What do you call an owl that is a magician too? Owls cannot be magician you retard.

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How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

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A padawan walks into a bar. He is promptly ridiculed by his master for not minding his surroundings.

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What do you call a black man in space? an astronaut

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What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Because he was too much of a bitch to when his friends dared him.

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How did the ship-less pirate cross the Atlantic? In an airplane.

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb? Any number of chickens plus one person.

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What did George W. Bush say to his wife when he got home? I'm home.

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Two guys walk in a bar, and they die.

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Why did the Mxican eat the taco? Because he was hungry,

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Knock knock Who's there? Yolanda I do not know anyone by that name. I am sorry Oh I must be at the wrong house. My apologies. Oh, it's alright. Have a nice day You too. Take care!

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What does Megatron say when a video game takes forever to load? "You have failed me yet again, Start Screen!"

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Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

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Knock Knock. KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. ANYBODY HOME?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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