when life gives you lemmons, chuck em' at beiber

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Haiku's are three lines long. This isn't a haiku.

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Miley Cyrus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted honey. Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to get to his house. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stupid.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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My mother-in-law is so ugly I actually feel quite sorry for her.

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Why did a blind man buy a violin. To learn how to play a violin.

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A man runs into a bar, he is in a coma for 7 years and most likely going to die, of severe brain damage.

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did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey Everything is grey I'm color blind.

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Why did the alligator travel through time? To get to the other side.

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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Why did the elephant cross the river? CAUSE YOLO (even though he died)

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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who has brown eyes blonde hair and red lips a human-being

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If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number. she rolled up her sleeve.

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Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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What did the cow say to the bull. they had kids because they shared an interest in being silent.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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