A dyslexic man walks into a bar.

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What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

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Are you from Tennessee? cuz i wanna makeout with your face.

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A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

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A white man asks a black man, "Did you fall into a chimney?" and laughs. The man proceeds to wash off his hands and face to reveal beautiful, dark-brown skin. Then they both joke about it because they are best friends.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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What do you call a man covered in magnets? Attractive

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Are women better than men? Dont know but what we do know is they swing at bigger balls (softballs), shoot from lower basketball nets, do pushups from their knees. Shall I go on?

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Funding a half worm in your apple because you just ate half of a worm!

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

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When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

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What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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Are you a tree? No.

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They're two completely different water fowl.

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Why did the black man kill himself? Because he was black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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